Monday, December 22, 2008
Friday, December 12, 2008
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Boston in the movies
For roughly 15 of my 38 years I lived in the greater Boston area - Sudbury, East Cambridge, The Fens, Brighton, and Watertown - these were the places I lived. I used to hang out at The Druid in Inman Square, Donohue's on Bigelow Ave in Watertown, Watch City Brewing in Waltham, The Sunset Grille, and the Kells, just to name a few of my favorite places.
I enjoy watching films that feature Boston for a number of reasons (we WILL NOT discuss the abomination that is Blown Away), not the least of which is the fact that I like seeing the places I know. At the same time it makes me feel both homesick and a little less homesick.
There have been some decidedly average films that I enjoyed - The Matchmaker, From the Hip, and sure, there have been some dogs in there - Blown Away, Fever Pitch (I really wanted this to be so much better), Celtic Pride (I am sad to admit, I sort of worked on this film - my wife and I helped to keep the crowd in the Boston Garden entertained between takes of crowd shots) - but there have been some spectacular successes.
For my money, the best films shot on the streets of the Hub - even peripherally - include...
Field of Dreams
The Departed
Good Will Hunting
The Verdict
Mystic River
Monument Ave.
Glory
The Brinks Job
Southie
The Thomas Crown Affair (1968)
I bring all this up because I recently watched Gone Baby Gone. It was a good film, and I enjoyed it, yet I was still a little disappointed in it.
I made the mistake of reading the Dennis Lehane novel from which it was adapted first. The novel was far superior, and I likely would have enjoyed the film more had I not read the book first, but having read it first, there were a number of problems.
Like I said, I did think this was a good film, and I would recommend it, but here are some of the issues (many of which come from having read the book) -
Ben Affleck and his co-hort Aaron Stockard short-changed the character of Angela Gennaro, detective Patrick Kenzie's partner, making her a one dimensional character that was little more than a foil for Casey Affleck's Kenzie. The two also completely removed any hint at Kenzie's background as an abused child, something that in the books (there are five) is part of what drives the character. In this book it's part of what drives Kenzie to take this case against his better judgment.
While there were complaints from some critics that Morgan Freeman was miscast, my issues were with the people playing Cheese (and this one stems from the scripting choice), and Bubba.
In the book Cheese is of Nordic descent and likes to think he's black. A much more interesting character than the movie's version, and in reading the book, no one outside of Ben Affleck would come away with their image of Bubba meeting the one he portrayed in the film - that of a rap wannabe. Bubba was described essentially in the book as Vincent D'Onfrio's character from Full Metal Jacket - except he wasn't slow or dumb, and was a weapons savant.
The movie felt a little rushed, and could actually have stood to be a half hour to 45 minutes longer. There were certain scenes that would have benefited from a little more exposition, as would the character development - particularly of Angela.
There is a lot to recommend this film - the performances of Ed Harris, Amy Madigan, Titus Welliver and Amy Ryan were excellent, and Morgan Freeman was solid. Casey Affleck was even okay in a roll that didn't really suit him. The visuals of Dorchester were nice, and big brother Ben seems to have a good eye from behind the lens.
As I previously noted, I would recommend the film - just watch it before you read the book.
Where this film ranks among Boston films, I would probably rank them roughly in this order -
1. The Departed
2. Mystic River
3. Good Will Hunting
4. The Verdict
5. Field of Dreams
6. Glory
7. Monument Ave.
8. Southie
9. The Brinks Job
10. The Thomas Crown Affair (1968)
11. Gone Baby Gone
I enjoy watching films that feature Boston for a number of reasons (we WILL NOT discuss the abomination that is Blown Away), not the least of which is the fact that I like seeing the places I know. At the same time it makes me feel both homesick and a little less homesick.
There have been some decidedly average films that I enjoyed - The Matchmaker, From the Hip, and sure, there have been some dogs in there - Blown Away, Fever Pitch (I really wanted this to be so much better), Celtic Pride (I am sad to admit, I sort of worked on this film - my wife and I helped to keep the crowd in the Boston Garden entertained between takes of crowd shots) - but there have been some spectacular successes.
For my money, the best films shot on the streets of the Hub - even peripherally - include...
Field of Dreams
The Departed
Good Will Hunting
The Verdict
Mystic River
Monument Ave.
Glory
The Brinks Job
Southie
The Thomas Crown Affair (1968)
I bring all this up because I recently watched Gone Baby Gone. It was a good film, and I enjoyed it, yet I was still a little disappointed in it.
I made the mistake of reading the Dennis Lehane novel from which it was adapted first. The novel was far superior, and I likely would have enjoyed the film more had I not read the book first, but having read it first, there were a number of problems.
Like I said, I did think this was a good film, and I would recommend it, but here are some of the issues (many of which come from having read the book) -
Ben Affleck and his co-hort Aaron Stockard short-changed the character of Angela Gennaro, detective Patrick Kenzie's partner, making her a one dimensional character that was little more than a foil for Casey Affleck's Kenzie. The two also completely removed any hint at Kenzie's background as an abused child, something that in the books (there are five) is part of what drives the character. In this book it's part of what drives Kenzie to take this case against his better judgment.
While there were complaints from some critics that Morgan Freeman was miscast, my issues were with the people playing Cheese (and this one stems from the scripting choice), and Bubba.
In the book Cheese is of Nordic descent and likes to think he's black. A much more interesting character than the movie's version, and in reading the book, no one outside of Ben Affleck would come away with their image of Bubba meeting the one he portrayed in the film - that of a rap wannabe. Bubba was described essentially in the book as Vincent D'Onfrio's character from Full Metal Jacket - except he wasn't slow or dumb, and was a weapons savant.
The movie felt a little rushed, and could actually have stood to be a half hour to 45 minutes longer. There were certain scenes that would have benefited from a little more exposition, as would the character development - particularly of Angela.
There is a lot to recommend this film - the performances of Ed Harris, Amy Madigan, Titus Welliver and Amy Ryan were excellent, and Morgan Freeman was solid. Casey Affleck was even okay in a roll that didn't really suit him. The visuals of Dorchester were nice, and big brother Ben seems to have a good eye from behind the lens.
As I previously noted, I would recommend the film - just watch it before you read the book.
Where this film ranks among Boston films, I would probably rank them roughly in this order -
1. The Departed
2. Mystic River
3. Good Will Hunting
4. The Verdict
5. Field of Dreams
6. Glory
7. Monument Ave.
8. Southie
9. The Brinks Job
10. The Thomas Crown Affair (1968)
11. Gone Baby Gone
Friday, August 8, 2008
The Fives
My wife believes that Dave over at Dave's movie corner/The Coffin Corner may very well be my doppelganger. I disagree - he's way more prolific than I, and he's better about keeping his entertainment blog updated. That said, there are a lot of parallels, including our tendency to try to rank films.
Well, with a little extra time on my hands this evening, I decided to start a new feature that I'm calling The Fives - five capsule lists of top five films, not necessarily related, and just because one film makes one list, it does not preclude it from making another list.
These are solely my opinion, and none of these lists are set in stone.
In the immortal words of Jackie Gleason, "and awaaaayyyyyy we go....."
The top five comic book adaptations (keep in mind, this is not just super heroes, this is comic books in general)
5. The Crow - I don't know how much attention this movie would have received were it not for Brandon Lee's untimely death, but it deserved all the attention it received. I might be ranking this higher on the list than it deserves, but Lee easily gives the best performance of his career, showing actual range, and the movie does a good job of capturing the spirit of Jame's O'Barr's sometimes too lachrymose prose. If anything, I would argue that the film was superior to the comic.
4. Akira - Adapted from the hit comic back in 1988, Akira was not only a revolutionary piece of animation, pushing the limits of non-computer generated animation, but it was also a complex storyline that also provided a look at how the Japanese were impacted by the bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki on a cultural level.
3. A History of Violence - Just see it. If you haven't, you need to. It will give you a whole new perspective on Aragorn.
2. The Dark Knight - I have to say, if I didn't know that the Joker was played by Heath Ledger, I wouldn't have known it was him. That's how good his performance was. The movie itself was much darker than Batman Begins, and borrowed heavily from story-lines in the series including Frank Miller's "Year One" story arc. Fully worth the price of admission.
1. American Splendor - While DK might net an Oscar nomination for Heath Ledger, Paul Giamatti should have received a nomination for his portrayal of AS author Harvey Pekar. While I will concede that 2003 was a difficult year with great performances from Sean Penn (Mystic River), Johnny Depp (Pirates of the Caribbean), Ben Kingsley (House of Sand and Fog), Bill Murray (Lost in Translation), and Jude Law (Cold Mountain), but Giamatti was as good, if not better than several of those. If you have not seen this - rent it, buy it, find someone who has it...just see it. I'm not even a Pekar fan, but this might be the best adaptation of a comic book ever shot.
Honorable mentions - Iron Man, Superman (1978), The Rocketeer
Top five most influential comic book adapted films
5. Batman and Robin - The 1997 release had the potential, particularly combined with the failure of Spawn and Steel in the same year, to completely kill comic books as source material for Hollywood's studios.
4. Sin City - Visually stunning, the film, while lacking a little in the way of plot (as does the comic book), the film was designed to look like the comic on screen. The director has gone on, using the same method, to bring Miller's 300 to screen in the same way, and will soon see The Spirit, Sin City II, and Watchmen all come to screen in the same way.
3. Ghost World - The critical success of this 2001 release led the way for other non-super hero adaptations such as American Splendor and A History of Violence.
2. Blade - The low budget film about a fringe Marvel Comics character put out by indie giant New Line Cinema came out little more than a year after Batman and Robin. While it had a smaller box office take than Batman and Robin, the profit margin was considerably larger, and once again made executives look at the graphic forum for film ideas.
1. Batman - As bad as this 1989 release really was, it was well received at the time, and a blockbuster that paved the way for any number of the super hero adaptations that have been produced since the beginning of the 1990's.
Top five coming of age films
5. American Graffiti - Easily the best film ever made by George Lucas, this nostalgic look at that final night before leaving for college should be noted for everything from the performances of Ron Howard and Richard Dreyfuss, and a killer soundtrack to truly skilled writing. If for nothing else, watch it again if just to be reminded that Lucas once showed an enormous amount of potential as a young filmmaker.
4. Almost Famous - This was a helluva film. Like American Graffiti, this is both a nostalgic look at the 1970's, the teen years, and even where popular music was in its development. But more than that, it was Cameron Crowe's telling of his own coming of age story with a gentle humor, and, very likely, through somewhat rose-colored glasses. None the less, it is a well told story about a teenager finding his place in life.
3. Stand by Me - Wil Wheaton's moment of greatness, this adaptation of Stephen Kings' short story "The Body" is the second film on this list with Richard Dreyfuss, only this time Dreyfuss is telling the story, flashing back to a key time in his life. One of Rob Reiner's best films, Stand by Me features some great performances from the likes of a young River Phoenix, Jerry O'Connell (yeah, the pretty boy was then the chubby kid - who'da thought?), Kiefer Sutherland, and Corey Feldman showed why people thought he was destined for big things.
2. Breaking Away - Not only one of the great sports films of all time, but a great coming of age tale about some Indiana boys in an Indiana town. Like American Graffiti, this tale took place after high school graduation. Unlike AG, it's over the the course of the following summer and fall as the four friends begin to find their path in life.
1. The Graduate - "One word...plastics." Interestingly enough, this might be the only one of the films on the list where the main character, the one that made Dustin Hoffman a star, might be as unsure about his place in life at the end of the film as he was at the beginning. However, as confused as he may be, he has figured out at least one thing. If you haven't seen it, I'm not telling.
Honorable mentions - Saved!, Angus, The Breakfast Club, Big, Dead Poets Society, Juno, Au revoir Les Enfants, Good Will Hunting, American Pie
Top five buddy films
5. Rosencrantz and Guidenstern are Dead - Brilliant movie, and probably not a choice to make most people's list. The only existentialist buddy film to make the list, it is a comedy - but not exactly a belly-laugher.
4. Shaun of the Dead - By the film school definition, this one is a borderline buddy film (a strong argument can be made that the focus is on Shaun, and that everyone else is supporting), but I feel that there's a reason that the movie goes out on Queen's "You're My Best Friend" while Shaun is playing video games with former flat-mate Ed.
3. The Odd Couple - Jack Lemon and Walter Mathau in the Neil Simon classic. 'Nuff said.
2. The Blues Brothers - One of my favorite movies of all-time, not only is it a great comedy from John Landis' heyday, but it had some absolutely brilliant cameos. This movie was amidst a stretch from Landis that started in 1977 with the often raw and erratic but also at times extraordinarily funny Kentucky Fried Movie and ended with 1985's Into the Night before a variety of films that received mixed reviews. That eight year stretch included Animal House, An American Werewolf in London, Trading Places, and Twilight Zone: The Movie. This was among the three best, and deserves all the kudos it gets.
1. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid - Ironically, one of the elements of this film for which BJ Thomas won an Oscar, I feel is one of the weakest points of an otherwise great film, and top ten Western. The song "Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head," while not an inherently bad song, is both jarring (there's no other music like this in the film), and grounds the film in its time period - there's nothing else about the film that does so, it easily could have been shot today. The movie, while remembered for its now oft honored and parodied ending, has an equally great opening - Robert Redford as the Sundance Kid playing poker, accused of cheating by one of the fellow players. If you haven't seen it, I won't write any more about it right here. See it for yourself.
Honorable mentions - The Sting, Fight Club (didn't think that would come up here, didja?), The In-Laws (1979), The Man Who Would Be King, Some Like it Hot, Monsters Inc.
Top five Stephen King adaptations
5. The Mist - Sometimes a little erratic with the special effects, this monster movie can be viewed as an allegory for the growing schism between the conservatives and liberals in this country. The performances are top-notch, as is the direction by Frank Darabont. It is at times overwhelming, brutal, and unforgiving.
4. Stand by Me - The second time this film hit the (Five's) list, it's a surprisingly gentle coming of age story from the master of horror well crafted by the same guy that gave us Spinal Tap, The Sure Thing, and The Princess Bride.
3. Misery - Maxim had the greatest line about how disturbing Kathy Bates is as Annie in this film, and it's all you need to know..."she made Sonny Corleone cry." If you haven't seen this, see it. Now.
2. The Shawshank Redemption - The second of Darabont's films to make this particular corner of these lists, Shawshank deserved every accolade it received, and deserved much greater box-office than it did. This is one of those films that was a critical success that lasted in the theaters for a month, tops. Nothing short of amazing for a film that most everyone is now familiar with.
1. The Shining - One of many great films from Stanley Kubrik, hated by Stephen King. Visually stunning, this remains one of the top five horror films of all time. Jack Nicholson is at his psychotic best, and there's a creep factor that cannot be denied. People that don't like this film don't know how a horror film should be made.
Honorable mentions - Creepshow, Dolores Claiborne, The Dead Zone. Admittedly, I have not yet seen Apt Pupil, The Green Mile, or 1408.
Well, with a little extra time on my hands this evening, I decided to start a new feature that I'm calling The Fives - five capsule lists of top five films, not necessarily related, and just because one film makes one list, it does not preclude it from making another list.
These are solely my opinion, and none of these lists are set in stone.
In the immortal words of Jackie Gleason, "and awaaaayyyyyy we go....."
The top five comic book adaptations (keep in mind, this is not just super heroes, this is comic books in general)
5. The Crow - I don't know how much attention this movie would have received were it not for Brandon Lee's untimely death, but it deserved all the attention it received. I might be ranking this higher on the list than it deserves, but Lee easily gives the best performance of his career, showing actual range, and the movie does a good job of capturing the spirit of Jame's O'Barr's sometimes too lachrymose prose. If anything, I would argue that the film was superior to the comic.
4. Akira - Adapted from the hit comic back in 1988, Akira was not only a revolutionary piece of animation, pushing the limits of non-computer generated animation, but it was also a complex storyline that also provided a look at how the Japanese were impacted by the bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki on a cultural level.
3. A History of Violence - Just see it. If you haven't, you need to. It will give you a whole new perspective on Aragorn.
2. The Dark Knight - I have to say, if I didn't know that the Joker was played by Heath Ledger, I wouldn't have known it was him. That's how good his performance was. The movie itself was much darker than Batman Begins, and borrowed heavily from story-lines in the series including Frank Miller's "Year One" story arc. Fully worth the price of admission.
1. American Splendor - While DK might net an Oscar nomination for Heath Ledger, Paul Giamatti should have received a nomination for his portrayal of AS author Harvey Pekar. While I will concede that 2003 was a difficult year with great performances from Sean Penn (Mystic River), Johnny Depp (Pirates of the Caribbean), Ben Kingsley (House of Sand and Fog), Bill Murray (Lost in Translation), and Jude Law (Cold Mountain), but Giamatti was as good, if not better than several of those. If you have not seen this - rent it, buy it, find someone who has it...just see it. I'm not even a Pekar fan, but this might be the best adaptation of a comic book ever shot.
Honorable mentions - Iron Man, Superman (1978), The Rocketeer
Top five most influential comic book adapted films
5. Batman and Robin - The 1997 release had the potential, particularly combined with the failure of Spawn and Steel in the same year, to completely kill comic books as source material for Hollywood's studios.
4. Sin City - Visually stunning, the film, while lacking a little in the way of plot (as does the comic book), the film was designed to look like the comic on screen. The director has gone on, using the same method, to bring Miller's 300 to screen in the same way, and will soon see The Spirit, Sin City II, and Watchmen all come to screen in the same way.
3. Ghost World - The critical success of this 2001 release led the way for other non-super hero adaptations such as American Splendor and A History of Violence.
2. Blade - The low budget film about a fringe Marvel Comics character put out by indie giant New Line Cinema came out little more than a year after Batman and Robin. While it had a smaller box office take than Batman and Robin, the profit margin was considerably larger, and once again made executives look at the graphic forum for film ideas.
1. Batman - As bad as this 1989 release really was, it was well received at the time, and a blockbuster that paved the way for any number of the super hero adaptations that have been produced since the beginning of the 1990's.
Top five coming of age films
5. American Graffiti - Easily the best film ever made by George Lucas, this nostalgic look at that final night before leaving for college should be noted for everything from the performances of Ron Howard and Richard Dreyfuss, and a killer soundtrack to truly skilled writing. If for nothing else, watch it again if just to be reminded that Lucas once showed an enormous amount of potential as a young filmmaker.
4. Almost Famous - This was a helluva film. Like American Graffiti, this is both a nostalgic look at the 1970's, the teen years, and even where popular music was in its development. But more than that, it was Cameron Crowe's telling of his own coming of age story with a gentle humor, and, very likely, through somewhat rose-colored glasses. None the less, it is a well told story about a teenager finding his place in life.
3. Stand by Me - Wil Wheaton's moment of greatness, this adaptation of Stephen Kings' short story "The Body" is the second film on this list with Richard Dreyfuss, only this time Dreyfuss is telling the story, flashing back to a key time in his life. One of Rob Reiner's best films, Stand by Me features some great performances from the likes of a young River Phoenix, Jerry O'Connell (yeah, the pretty boy was then the chubby kid - who'da thought?), Kiefer Sutherland, and Corey Feldman showed why people thought he was destined for big things.
2. Breaking Away - Not only one of the great sports films of all time, but a great coming of age tale about some Indiana boys in an Indiana town. Like American Graffiti, this tale took place after high school graduation. Unlike AG, it's over the the course of the following summer and fall as the four friends begin to find their path in life.
1. The Graduate - "One word...plastics." Interestingly enough, this might be the only one of the films on the list where the main character, the one that made Dustin Hoffman a star, might be as unsure about his place in life at the end of the film as he was at the beginning. However, as confused as he may be, he has figured out at least one thing. If you haven't seen it, I'm not telling.
Honorable mentions - Saved!, Angus, The Breakfast Club, Big, Dead Poets Society, Juno, Au revoir Les Enfants, Good Will Hunting, American Pie
Top five buddy films
5. Rosencrantz and Guidenstern are Dead - Brilliant movie, and probably not a choice to make most people's list. The only existentialist buddy film to make the list, it is a comedy - but not exactly a belly-laugher.
4. Shaun of the Dead - By the film school definition, this one is a borderline buddy film (a strong argument can be made that the focus is on Shaun, and that everyone else is supporting), but I feel that there's a reason that the movie goes out on Queen's "You're My Best Friend" while Shaun is playing video games with former flat-mate Ed.
3. The Odd Couple - Jack Lemon and Walter Mathau in the Neil Simon classic. 'Nuff said.
2. The Blues Brothers - One of my favorite movies of all-time, not only is it a great comedy from John Landis' heyday, but it had some absolutely brilliant cameos. This movie was amidst a stretch from Landis that started in 1977 with the often raw and erratic but also at times extraordinarily funny Kentucky Fried Movie and ended with 1985's Into the Night before a variety of films that received mixed reviews. That eight year stretch included Animal House, An American Werewolf in London, Trading Places, and Twilight Zone: The Movie. This was among the three best, and deserves all the kudos it gets.
1. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid - Ironically, one of the elements of this film for which BJ Thomas won an Oscar, I feel is one of the weakest points of an otherwise great film, and top ten Western. The song "Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head," while not an inherently bad song, is both jarring (there's no other music like this in the film), and grounds the film in its time period - there's nothing else about the film that does so, it easily could have been shot today. The movie, while remembered for its now oft honored and parodied ending, has an equally great opening - Robert Redford as the Sundance Kid playing poker, accused of cheating by one of the fellow players. If you haven't seen it, I won't write any more about it right here. See it for yourself.
Honorable mentions - The Sting, Fight Club (didn't think that would come up here, didja?), The In-Laws (1979), The Man Who Would Be King, Some Like it Hot, Monsters Inc.
Top five Stephen King adaptations
5. The Mist - Sometimes a little erratic with the special effects, this monster movie can be viewed as an allegory for the growing schism between the conservatives and liberals in this country. The performances are top-notch, as is the direction by Frank Darabont. It is at times overwhelming, brutal, and unforgiving.
4. Stand by Me - The second time this film hit the (Five's) list, it's a surprisingly gentle coming of age story from the master of horror well crafted by the same guy that gave us Spinal Tap, The Sure Thing, and The Princess Bride.
3. Misery - Maxim had the greatest line about how disturbing Kathy Bates is as Annie in this film, and it's all you need to know..."she made Sonny Corleone cry." If you haven't seen this, see it. Now.
2. The Shawshank Redemption - The second of Darabont's films to make this particular corner of these lists, Shawshank deserved every accolade it received, and deserved much greater box-office than it did. This is one of those films that was a critical success that lasted in the theaters for a month, tops. Nothing short of amazing for a film that most everyone is now familiar with.
1. The Shining - One of many great films from Stanley Kubrik, hated by Stephen King. Visually stunning, this remains one of the top five horror films of all time. Jack Nicholson is at his psychotic best, and there's a creep factor that cannot be denied. People that don't like this film don't know how a horror film should be made.
Honorable mentions - Creepshow, Dolores Claiborne, The Dead Zone. Admittedly, I have not yet seen Apt Pupil, The Green Mile, or 1408.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Answering the Suldog's meaningless questions...
Coke or Pepsi? Coke
7-Up or Sprite? Sprite
Kool-Aid or Hawaiian Punch? Hawaiian Punch
McDonald's or Burger King? McD's
Wendy's or White Castle? Wendy's
Soyburgers or Tofu Dogs? MEAT!
Ginger or Mary Ann? Mary Ann
Wilma Flintstone or Betty Rubble? Betty
Laverne DeFazio or Shirley Feeney? Shirley
Marge Simpson or Jane Jetson? Jetson
Olive Oyl or Peggy Hill? Any of the above instead
George Reeves or Christoper Reeve? Christopher Reeve
Adam West or Michael Keaton? West
Clayton Moore or Klinton Spilsbury? How can you not love an actor so bad in his first role that he never got another? That said, Clayton Moore.
Playboy or Penthouse? Playboy
Gallery or Hustler? Is this a trick question?
Sports Illustrated or National Geographic? SI
New York Times or New York Post? Times
USA Today or Your Local Paper? Local
National Enquirer or Weekly World News? WWN
Krispy Kreme or Dunkin' Donuts? Dunkin'
Jell-O or Pudding? Pudding
Ice Cream or Cake? depends on the flavors
Marijuana or Alcohol? Alcohol
LSD or Peyote? n/a
Heroin or Crack? n/a
Menthol Cigarettes or Non-Menthol? Neither
A Pipe or A Cigar? Neither
Snuff or Chewing Tobacco? Neither
Ivory or Dove? Ivory
Tidy Bowl or 2000 Flushes? Who cares
Charmin or The Sears-Roebuck Catalogue? Charmin
Alice Cooper or KISS? Cooper
Rush or The Guess Who? Rush
AC/DC or Black Sabbath? AC/DC
Deep Purple or Led Zep? Zep
The Who or The Rolling Stones? The Who
The Beatles or Chuck Berry? The Beetles
Jerry Lee Lewis or Little Richard? Little Richard
Baseball or Football? Football
Basketball or Hockey? Basketball
Volleyball or Lacrosse? Volleyball
Protestant or Catholic? Catholic
Reform, Conservative, or Orthodox? Reform
Atheist or Agnostic? Atheist
Big Bang or Creationism? Bang
Evolution or Devolution? Evolution
Slide, Swing, or See-Saw? Slide
Wedgie or Cup Check? cup check
Married or Single? married
Monogamy or Polygamy? monogamy
Gay or Straight? straight
Straight or Curly? bald
Curly or Shemp? curly
Shemp or Joe? shemp
Joe or Curly Joe? joe
Fred Astaire or Gene Kelly? Gene Kelly
Ginger Rogers or Cyd Charrise? Cyd
'62 Mets or '03 Tigers? 62 Mets
Superman or Spiderman? Superman
Batman or Captain America? Batman
Dr. Doom or Lex Luthor? Luthor
Carnivore, Omnivore, or Vegetarian? Carnivore
Vegetarian or Vegan? CARNIVORE
Vegan or Starvation? WHERE'S MY MEAT!?
The Three Stooges or The Marx Brothers? Marx Brothers
Laurel & Hardy or Abbott & Costello? Abbott and Costello
Martin & Lewis or Rowan & Martin? Rowan Atkinson count?
The Munsters or The Addams Family? Addams Family
Bewitched or I Dream Of Jeannie? Neither
Wife Swap or A Kick In The Nuts? A hard kick in the nuts
Boxers or Briefs? Depends on what I'm doing
Baggies or A Speedo? Baggies
Bloomers or Butt Floss? um...n/a
Sock-Sock-Shoe-Shoe or Sock-Shoe-Sock-Shoe?the first
Grecian Urn or Henway? Urn
And Don't Call Me Shirley or Take My Wife, Please? Shirley
Pie Fight or Genteel Social Satire Full of Clever Bons Mots?depends on the mood
7-Up or Sprite? Sprite
Kool-Aid or Hawaiian Punch? Hawaiian Punch
McDonald's or Burger King? McD's
Wendy's or White Castle? Wendy's
Soyburgers or Tofu Dogs? MEAT!
Ginger or Mary Ann? Mary Ann
Wilma Flintstone or Betty Rubble? Betty
Laverne DeFazio or Shirley Feeney? Shirley
Marge Simpson or Jane Jetson? Jetson
Olive Oyl or Peggy Hill? Any of the above instead
George Reeves or Christoper Reeve? Christopher Reeve
Adam West or Michael Keaton? West
Clayton Moore or Klinton Spilsbury? How can you not love an actor so bad in his first role that he never got another? That said, Clayton Moore.
Playboy or Penthouse? Playboy
Gallery or Hustler? Is this a trick question?
Sports Illustrated or National Geographic? SI
New York Times or New York Post? Times
USA Today or Your Local Paper? Local
National Enquirer or Weekly World News? WWN
Krispy Kreme or Dunkin' Donuts? Dunkin'
Jell-O or Pudding? Pudding
Ice Cream or Cake? depends on the flavors
Marijuana or Alcohol? Alcohol
LSD or Peyote? n/a
Heroin or Crack? n/a
Menthol Cigarettes or Non-Menthol? Neither
A Pipe or A Cigar? Neither
Snuff or Chewing Tobacco? Neither
Ivory or Dove? Ivory
Tidy Bowl or 2000 Flushes? Who cares
Charmin or The Sears-Roebuck Catalogue? Charmin
Alice Cooper or KISS? Cooper
Rush or The Guess Who? Rush
AC/DC or Black Sabbath? AC/DC
Deep Purple or Led Zep? Zep
The Who or The Rolling Stones? The Who
The Beatles or Chuck Berry? The Beetles
Jerry Lee Lewis or Little Richard? Little Richard
Baseball or Football? Football
Basketball or Hockey? Basketball
Volleyball or Lacrosse? Volleyball
Protestant or Catholic? Catholic
Reform, Conservative, or Orthodox? Reform
Atheist or Agnostic? Atheist
Big Bang or Creationism? Bang
Evolution or Devolution? Evolution
Slide, Swing, or See-Saw? Slide
Wedgie or Cup Check? cup check
Married or Single? married
Monogamy or Polygamy? monogamy
Gay or Straight? straight
Straight or Curly? bald
Curly or Shemp? curly
Shemp or Joe? shemp
Joe or Curly Joe? joe
Fred Astaire or Gene Kelly? Gene Kelly
Ginger Rogers or Cyd Charrise? Cyd
'62 Mets or '03 Tigers? 62 Mets
Superman or Spiderman? Superman
Batman or Captain America? Batman
Dr. Doom or Lex Luthor? Luthor
Carnivore, Omnivore, or Vegetarian? Carnivore
Vegetarian or Vegan? CARNIVORE
Vegan or Starvation? WHERE'S MY MEAT!?
The Three Stooges or The Marx Brothers? Marx Brothers
Laurel & Hardy or Abbott & Costello? Abbott and Costello
Martin & Lewis or Rowan & Martin? Rowan Atkinson count?
The Munsters or The Addams Family? Addams Family
Bewitched or I Dream Of Jeannie? Neither
Wife Swap or A Kick In The Nuts? A hard kick in the nuts
Boxers or Briefs? Depends on what I'm doing
Baggies or A Speedo? Baggies
Bloomers or Butt Floss? um...n/a
Sock-Sock-Shoe-Shoe or Sock-Shoe-Sock-Shoe?the first
Grecian Urn or Henway? Urn
And Don't Call Me Shirley or Take My Wife, Please? Shirley
Pie Fight or Genteel Social Satire Full of Clever Bons Mots?depends on the mood
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