Gibbering Idiots

Merry Christmas to All

2008-12-22T16:25:00.000-08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EWjl80WFBzY

This is freakin' brilliant...

2008-12-12T10:24:00.001-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving!

2008-11-27T06:23:00.000-08:00

Enjoy...

Also -

Vote NO on Prop 8 (if you live in CA)

2008-10-21T06:03:00.002-07:00

Now is the time to donate. Let your support be known.

Boston in the movies

2008-08-28T15:37:00.000-07:00

For roughly 15 of my 38 years I lived in the greater Boston area - Sudbury, East Cambridge, The Fens, Brighton, and Watertown - these were the places I lived. I used to hang out at The Druid in Inman Square, Donohue's on Bigelow Ave in Watertown, Watch City Brewing in Waltham, The Sunset Grille, and the Kells, just to name a few of my favorite places.

I enjoy watching films that feature Boston for a number of reasons (we WILL NOT discuss the abomination that is Blown Away), not the least of which is the fact that I like seeing the places I know. At the same time it makes me feel both homesick and a little less homesick.

There have been some decidedly average films that I enjoyed - The Matchmaker, From the Hip, and sure, there have been some dogs in there - Blown Away, Fever Pitch (I really wanted this to be so much better), Celtic Pride (I am sad to admit, I sort of worked on this film - my wife and I helped to keep the crowd in the Boston Garden entertained between takes of crowd shots) - but there have been some spectacular successes.

For my money, the best films shot on the streets of the Hub - even peripherally - include...

Field of Dreams
The Departed
Good Will Hunting
The Verdict
Mystic River
Monument Ave.
Glory
The Brinks Job
Southie
The Thomas Crown Affair (1968)

I bring all this up because I recently watched Gone Baby Gone. It was a good film, and I enjoyed it, yet I was still a little disappointed in it.

I made the mistake of reading the Dennis Lehane novel from which it was adapted first. The novel was far superior, and I likely would have enjoyed the film more had I not read the book first, but having read it first, there were a number of problems.

Like I said, I did think this was a good film, and I would recommend it, but here are some of the issues (many of which come from having read the book) -

Ben Affleck and his co-hort Aaron Stockard short-changed the character of Angela Gennaro, detective Patrick Kenzie's partner, making her a one dimensional character that was little more than a foil for Casey Affleck's Kenzie. The two also completely removed any hint at Kenzie's background as an abused child, something that in the books (there are five) is part of what drives the character. In this book it's part of what drives Kenzie to take this case against his better judgment.

While there were complaints from some critics that Morgan Freeman was miscast, my issues were with the people playing Cheese (and this one stems from the scripting choice), and Bubba.

In the book Cheese is of Nordic descent and likes to think he's black. A much more interesting character than the movie's version, and in reading the book, no one outside of Ben Affleck would come away with their image of Bubba meeting the one he portrayed in the film - that of a rap wannabe. Bubba was described essentially in the book as Vincent D'Onfrio's character from Full Metal Jacket - except he wasn't slow or dumb, and was a weapons savant.

The movie felt a little rushed, and could actually have stood to be a half hour to 45 minutes longer. There were certain scenes that would have benefited from a little more exposition, as would the character development - particularly of Angela.

There is a lot to recommend this film - the performances of Ed Harris, Amy Madigan, Titus Welliver and Amy Ryan were excellent, and Morgan Freeman was solid. Casey Affleck was even okay in a roll that didn't really suit him. The visuals of Dorchester were nice, and big brother Ben seems to have a good eye from behind the lens.

As I previously noted, I would recommend the film - just watch it before you read the book.

Where this film ranks among Boston films, I would probably rank them roughly in this order -

1. The Departed
2. Mystic River
3. Good Will Hunting
4. The Verdict
5. Field of Dreams
6. Glory
7. Monument Ave.
8. Southie
9. The Brinks Job
10. The Thomas Crown Affair (1968)
11. Gone Baby Gone

The Fives

2008-08-08T15:49:00.000-07:00

My wife believes that Dave over at Dave's movie corner/The Coffin Corner may very well be my doppelganger. I disagree - he's way more prolific than I, and he's better about keeping his entertainment blog updated. That said, there are a lot of parallels, including our tendency to try to rank films.

Well, with a little extra time on my hands this evening, I decided to start a new feature that I'm calling The Fives - five capsule lists of top five films, not necessarily related, and just because one film makes one list, it does not preclude it from making another list.

These are solely my opinion, and none of these lists are set in stone.

In the immortal words of Jackie Gleason, "and awaaaayyyyyy we go....."

The top five comic book adaptations (keep in mind, this is not just super heroes, this is comic books in general)

5. The Crow - I don't know how much attention this movie would have received were it not for Brandon Lee's untimely death, but it deserved all the attention it received. I might be ranking this higher on the list than it deserves, but Lee easily gives the best performance of his career, showing actual range, and the movie does a good job of capturing the spirit of Jame's O'Barr's sometimes too lachrymose prose. If anything, I would argue that the film was superior to the comic.

4. Akira - Adapted from the hit comic back in 1988, Akira was not only a revolutionary piece of animation, pushing the limits of non-computer generated animation, but it was also a complex storyline that also provided a look at how the Japanese were impacted by the bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki on a cultural level.

3. A History of Violence - Just see it. If you haven't, you need to. It will give you a whole new perspective on Aragorn.

2. The Dark Knight - I have to say, if I didn't know that the Joker was played by Heath Ledger, I wouldn't have known it was him. That's how good his performance was. The movie itself was much darker than Batman Begins, and borrowed heavily from story-lines in the series including Frank Miller's "Year One" story arc. Fully worth the price of admission.

1. American Splendor - While DK might net an Oscar nomination for Heath Ledger, Paul Giamatti should have received a nomination for his portrayal of AS author Harvey Pekar. While I will concede that 2003 was a difficult year with great performances from Sean Penn (Mystic River), Johnny Depp (Pirates of the Caribbean), Ben Kingsley (House of Sand and Fog), Bill Murray (Lost in Translation), and Jude Law (Cold Mountain), but Giamatti was as good, if not better than several of those. If you have not seen this - rent it, buy it, find someone who has it...just see it. I'm not even a Pekar fan, but this might be the best adaptation of a comic book ever shot.

Honorable mentions - Iron Man, Superman (1978), The Rocketeer

Top five most influential comic book adapted films

5. Batman and Robin - The 1997 release had the potential, particularly combined with the failure of Spawn and Steel in the same year, to completely kill comic books as source material for Hollywood's studios.

4. Sin City - Visually stunning, the film, while lacking a little in the way of plot (as does the comic book), the film was designed to look like the comic on screen. The director has gone on, using the same method, to bring Miller's 300 to screen in the same way, and will soon see The Spirit, Sin City II, and Watchmen all come to screen in the same way.

3. Ghost World - The critical success of this 2001 release led the way for other non-super hero adaptations such as American Splendor and A History of Violence.

2. Blade - The low budget film about a fringe Marvel Comics character put out by indie giant New Line Cinema came out little more than a year after Batman and Robin. While it had a smaller box office take than Batman and Robin, the profit margin was considerably larger, and once again made executives look at the graphic forum for film ideas.

1. Batman - As bad as this 1989 release really was, it was well received at the time, and a blockbuster that paved the way for any number of the super hero adaptations that have been produced since the beginning of the 1990's.

Top five coming of age films

5. American Graffiti - Easily the best film ever made by George Lucas, this nostalgic look at that final night before leaving for college should be noted for everything from the performances of Ron Howard and Richard Dreyfuss, and a killer soundtrack to truly skilled writing. If for nothing else, watch it again if just to be reminded that Lucas once showed an enormous amount of potential as a young filmmaker.

4. Almost Famous - This was a helluva film. Like American Graffiti, this is both a nostalgic look at the 1970's, the teen years, and even where popular music was in its development. But more than that, it was Cameron Crowe's telling of his own coming of age story with a gentle humor, and, very likely, through somewhat rose-colored glasses. None the less, it is a well told story about a teenager finding his place in life.

3. Stand by Me - Wil Wheaton's moment of greatness, this adaptation of Stephen Kings' short story "The Body" is the second film on this list with Richard Dreyfuss, only this time Dreyfuss is telling the story, flashing back to a key time in his life. One of Rob Reiner's best films, Stand by Me features some great performances from the likes of a young River Phoenix, Jerry O'Connell (yeah, the pretty boy was then the chubby kid - who'da thought?), Kiefer Sutherland, and Corey Feldman showed why people thought he was destined for big things.

2. Breaking Away - Not only one of the great sports films of all time, but a great coming of age tale about some Indiana boys in an Indiana town. Like American Graffiti, this tale took place after high school graduation. Unlike AG, it's over the the course of the following summer and fall as the four friends begin to find their path in life.

1. The Graduate - "One word...plastics." Interestingly enough, this might be the only one of the films on the list where the main character, the one that made Dustin Hoffman a star, might be as unsure about his place in life at the end of the film as he was at the beginning. However, as confused as he may be, he has figured out at least one thing. If you haven't seen it, I'm not telling.

Honorable mentions - Saved!, Angus, The Breakfast Club, Big, Dead Poets Society, Juno, Au revoir Les Enfants, Good Will Hunting, American Pie

Top five buddy films

5. Rosencrantz and Guidenstern are Dead - Brilliant movie, and probably not a choice to make most people's list. The only existentialist buddy film to make the list, it is a comedy - but not exactly a belly-laugher.

4. Shaun of the Dead - By the film school definition, this one is a borderline buddy film (a strong argument can be made that the focus is on Shaun, and that everyone else is supporting), but I feel that there's a reason that the movie goes out on Queen's "You're My Best Friend" while Shaun is playing video games with former flat-mate Ed.

3. The Odd Couple - Jack Lemon and Walter Mathau in the Neil Simon classic. 'Nuff said.

2. The Blues Brothers - One of my favorite movies of all-time, not only is it a great comedy from John Landis' heyday, but it had some absolutely brilliant cameos. This movie was amidst a stretch from Landis that started in 1977 with the often raw and erratic but also at times extraordinarily funny Kentucky Fried Movie and ended with 1985's Into the Night before a variety of films that received mixed reviews. That eight year stretch included Animal House, An American Werewolf in London, Trading Places, and Twilight Zone: The Movie. This was among the three best, and deserves all the kudos it gets.

1. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid - Ironically, one of the elements of this film for which BJ Thomas won an Oscar, I feel is one of the weakest points of an otherwise great film, and top ten Western. The song "Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head," while not an inherently bad song, is both jarring (there's no other music like this in the film), and grounds the film in its time period - there's nothing else about the film that does so, it easily could have been shot today. The movie, while remembered for its now oft honored and parodied ending, has an equally great opening - Robert Redford as the Sundance Kid playing poker, accused of cheating by one of the fellow players. If you haven't seen it, I won't write any more about it right here. See it for yourself.

Honorable mentions - The Sting, Fight Club (didn't think that would come up here, didja?), The In-Laws (1979), The Man Who Would Be King, Some Like it Hot, Monsters Inc.

Top five Stephen King adaptations

5. The Mist - Sometimes a little erratic with the special effects, this monster movie can be viewed as an allegory for the growing schism between the conservatives and liberals in this country. The performances are top-notch, as is the direction by Frank Darabont. It is at times overwhelming, brutal, and unforgiving.

4. Stand by Me - The second time this film hit the (Five's) list, it's a surprisingly gentle coming of age story from the master of horror well crafted by the same guy that gave us Spinal Tap, The Sure Thing, and The Princess Bride.

3. Misery - Maxim had the greatest line about how disturbing Kathy Bates is as Annie in this film, and it's all you need to know..."she made Sonny Corleone cry." If you haven't seen this, see it. Now.

2. The Shawshank Redemption - The second of Darabont's films to make this particular corner of these lists, Shawshank deserved every accolade it received, and deserved much greater box-office than it did. This is one of those films that was a critical success that lasted in the theaters for a month, tops. Nothing short of amazing for a film that most everyone is now familiar with.

1. The Shining - One of many great films from Stanley Kubrik, hated by Stephen King. Visually stunning, this remains one of the top five horror films of all time. Jack Nicholson is at his psychotic best, and there's a creep factor that cannot be denied. People that don't like this film don't know how a horror film should be made.

Honorable mentions - Creepshow, Dolores Claiborne, The Dead Zone. Admittedly, I have not yet seen Apt Pupil, The Green Mile, or 1408.

Answering the Suldog's meaningless questions...

2008-07-24T05:38:00.000-07:00

Coke or Pepsi? Coke
7-Up or Sprite? Sprite
Kool-Aid or Hawaiian Punch? Hawaiian Punch

McDonald's or Burger King? McD's
Wendy's or White Castle? Wendy's
Soyburgers or Tofu Dogs? MEAT!

Ginger or Mary Ann? Mary Ann
Wilma Flintstone or Betty Rubble? Betty
Laverne DeFazio or Shirley Feeney? Shirley
Marge Simpson or Jane Jetson? Jetson
Olive Oyl or Peggy Hill? Any of the above instead

George Reeves or Christoper Reeve? Christopher Reeve
Adam West or Michael Keaton? West
Clayton Moore or Klinton Spilsbury? How can you not love an actor so bad in his first role that he never got another? That said, Clayton Moore.

Playboy or Penthouse? Playboy
Gallery or Hustler? Is this a trick question?
Sports Illustrated or National Geographic? SI

New York Times or New York Post? Times
USA Today or Your Local Paper? Local
National Enquirer or Weekly World News? WWN

Krispy Kreme or Dunkin' Donuts? Dunkin'
Jell-O or Pudding? Pudding
Ice Cream or Cake? depends on the flavors

Marijuana or Alcohol? Alcohol
LSD or Peyote? n/a
Heroin or Crack? n/a

Menthol Cigarettes or Non-Menthol? Neither
A Pipe or A Cigar? Neither
Snuff or Chewing Tobacco? Neither

Ivory or Dove? Ivory
Tidy Bowl or 2000 Flushes? Who cares
Charmin or The Sears-Roebuck Catalogue? Charmin

Alice Cooper or KISS? Cooper
Rush or The Guess Who? Rush
AC/DC or Black Sabbath? AC/DC
Deep Purple or Led Zep? Zep
The Who or The Rolling Stones? The Who
The Beatles or Chuck Berry? The Beetles
Jerry Lee Lewis or Little Richard? Little Richard

Baseball or Football? Football
Basketball or Hockey? Basketball
Volleyball or Lacrosse? Volleyball

Protestant or Catholic? Catholic
Reform, Conservative, or Orthodox? Reform
Atheist or Agnostic? Atheist
Big Bang or Creationism? Bang
Evolution or Devolution? Evolution

Slide, Swing, or See-Saw? Slide

Wedgie or Cup Check? cup check

Married or Single? married
Monogamy or Polygamy? monogamy
Gay or Straight? straight
Straight or Curly? bald
Curly or Shemp? curly
Shemp or Joe? shemp
Joe or Curly Joe? joe

Fred Astaire or Gene Kelly? Gene Kelly
Ginger Rogers or Cyd Charrise? Cyd

'62 Mets or '03 Tigers? 62 Mets

Superman or Spiderman? Superman
Batman or Captain America? Batman
Dr. Doom or Lex Luthor? Luthor

Carnivore, Omnivore, or Vegetarian? Carnivore
Vegetarian or Vegan? CARNIVORE
Vegan or Starvation? WHERE'S MY MEAT!?

The Three Stooges or The Marx Brothers? Marx Brothers
Laurel & Hardy or Abbott & Costello? Abbott and Costello
Martin & Lewis or Rowan & Martin? Rowan Atkinson count?

The Munsters or The Addams Family? Addams Family
Bewitched or I Dream Of Jeannie? Neither
Wife Swap or A Kick In The Nuts? A hard kick in the nuts

Boxers or Briefs? Depends on what I'm doing
Baggies or A Speedo? Baggies
Bloomers or Butt Floss? um...n/a

Sock-Sock-Shoe-Shoe or Sock-Shoe-Sock-Shoe?the first

Grecian Urn or Henway? Urn
And Don't Call Me Shirley or Take My Wife, Please? Shirley
Pie Fight or Genteel Social Satire Full of Clever Bons Mots?depends on the mood

Zombie Meme from my wife...

2008-07-24T05:31:00.000-07:00

You are in a mall when zombies attack. You have:
1. One weapon
2. One song blasting on the speakers
3. One famous person to fight along side you.

1. An aluminum bat (I know, as a purist, I shouldn't go aluminum - however, I don't have to worry about reloading or the wood splitting).
2. Where is the Love by The Black Eyed Peas (what can I say, I'm a fan of irony)
3. Tony Jaa

I tag no one, but readers should feel free to participate in this one.

The Avatar

2008-07-17T16:58:00.000-07:00

I have to admit, I have a soft place for Avatar: The Last Airbender. Not only is it well written, but the producers have gone out of the way to have the animators study real martial arts in creating their fictional world and animate the characters accordingly.

Speaking as one who has studied karate and Kung-fu for close to three decades, I have to say that they have done a really impressive job with it.

I watch the show regularly with my six-year old daughter, who has asked me to draw her the female characters, and my wife.

I recently took a test to see what character I was most like -

What Avatar: The Last Airbender Character are you? Your Result: you are toph you are pretty arrogant and rough, but you can be kind when you want to be. You enjoy what you do when you put your mind to it, and When it comes to what people think of your appearence, you often don't care because you can't see it yourself
you are Iroh
you are Sokka
you are Suko
You are Katara
You are Aang
you are Azula
You are the Cabbage merchant
What Avatar: The Last Airbender Character are you? Take More Quizzes

Memed...damn you wife, damn you

2008-07-16T19:28:00.000-07:00

So, I've been memed.

Evidently I have to pick an album released for every year I've been alive. Damn pain in the ass wife. My only requirement is that the artist is someone I like. Where possible I utilized albums I particularly enjoy.

As always, the meme dies here...

1970 - Let It Be, The Beatles
1971 - Electric Warrior, T Rex
1972 - The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars, David Bowie
1973 - Quadrophenia, The Who
1974 - The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway, Genesis
1975 - Blood on the Tracks, Bob Dylan
1976 - Schoolboys in Disgrace, The Kinks
1977 - Talking Heads: 77, Talking Heads
1978 - The Kick Inside, Kate Bush
1979 - London Calling, The Clash
1980 - Kaleidoscope, Siouxsie and the Banshees
1981 - Moving Pictures, Rush
1982 - Security, Peter Gabriel
1983 - The Final Cut, Pink Floyd
1984 - A Pagan Place, The Waterboys
1985 - White City, Pete Townsend
1986 - License to Ill, Run DMC
1987 - In Real Time, Fairport Convention
1988 - If I Should Fall From Grace With God, The Pogues
1989 - New York, Lou Reed
1990 - Social Distortion, Social Distortion
1991 - Blood Sugar Sex Magik, Red Hot Chili Peppers
1992 - 3 Years, 5 Months and 2 Days in the Life of..., Arrested Development
1993 - Fire of Freedom, Black 47
1994 - Under the Pink, Tori Amos
1995 - Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness, Smashing Pumpkins
1996 - Sublime, Sublime
1997 - Urban Hymns, The Verve
1998 - Americana, Offspring
1999 - Rock Art and the X-Ray Style, Joe Strummer and the Mescaleros
2000 - The Distance to Here, Live
2001 - Sing Loud, Sing Proud, Dropkick Murphys
2002 - England Half English, Billy Bragg
2003 - Throwing Muses, Throwing Muses
2004 - American Idiot, Green Day
2005 - Knuckle Down, Ani DiFranco
2006 - Pearl Jam, Pearl Jam
2007 - Learning to Sing Like a Star, Kristin Hersh
2008 - Songs From Rain, Hothouse Flowers

VOTE! VOTE! VOTE!

2008-07-03T17:57:00.000-07:00

Newest Threadless design...

2008-06-29T18:19:00.000-07:00

Ladies and gents - my second Threadless Tee attempt.

Your support, as always, is appreciated...

The Greatest Legs Ever passed on to that great stage in the sky

2008-06-17T17:29:00.000-07:00

Cyd Charisse passed away today in her home. She was 87 years old.

I'm not big into musicals, never have been, but I first saw Charisse as a kid in the skit she did as part of Singing in the Rain - and I have to say, I went through puberty then. By all accounts, an extraordinarily classy woman, Charisse exuded sex appeal.

Just as famous for her screen presence as her legs that stretched from New York to Idaho, Cherise was honored by Fred Astaire in his autobiography with the following line, "That Cyd! When you've danced with her you stay danced with."

Rest in peace.

This is about dead on...

2008-05-08T07:58:00.000-07:00

The computer geek take on the Democratic primaries.

New shrew discovered in Ireland...

2008-04-29T05:25:00.000-07:00

And don't say, "No surprise there!"- they mean the small furry animal type of shrew...

New shrew discovered in Ireland

and, just for kicks, a story with the following sentence:

To see if the wasps experienced "happy endings," the researchers monitored the wasps and orchids in the field.

The missing comedies

2008-04-27T06:32:00.000-07:00

So, I was discussing my list of 100 comedies with my wife last night. I knew before discussing it with her that we would have some differences as to what should be on the list and where - though probably not as significantly as my differences with Bravo's list. Talking with her, though, I remembered a number of other films that slipped my mind. I would like to present the following list for consideration and would love some feedback as to what the readers here feel should make the list, and what should be eliminated. As I mentioned in the previous post, I expect this list to evolve as I re-watch and remember films...

The Addams Family

Addams Family Values

Bringing Up Baby

Broadway Danny Rose

Cold Comfort Farm

Delicatessen

Duck Soup

The Hudsucker Proxy

The Gods Must Be Crazy

Kung-Fu Hustle

Little Shop of Horrors (musical)

The Muppet Movie

My Fellow Americans

Parenthood

Play It Again, Sam

Radio Days

Scrooged!

Take the Money and Run

Thank You for Smoking

The Thin Man (series)

The 100 comedies revisited

2008-04-25T05:29:00.000-07:00

I will start this post with a couple of caveats...I will acknowledge that I have not seen every comedy out there, that this list is subject to changes based on viewing things like Kind Hearts and Coronets which I have not yet viewed, or re-viewings of films like The Russians Are Coming, or It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World.

You will notice that there are a number of films with a second number by them such as "46. 30 The 40-Year Old Virgin." That second number is the ranking the "experts" at Bravo gave the film. Any without that second number did not make Bravo's list. All told, I eliminated 51 of Bravo's films. After all, their list was the "greatest comedies," which I interpreted as two possible things - great films that are comedies, or extraordinarily funny films which are good films (which is why you don't see Police Academy on the list - while funny, at times, it's just not a good film).

Some of the criteria I considered in ranking was how much I enjoyed the film as a whole, how much it made me laugh, and, at times, how much it made me think.

Once again, keep in mind, this is my opinion, and based on what I could recall. I am certainly open to suggestions and being reminded of films that are out there that I may have seen and long since forgotten about. I am always open to suggestions...particularly if it directs me to a film I haven't seen before.

So...here's my reworking...

100. 15 Fast Times at Ridgemont High
99. The Bad News Bears (1976)
98. High Fidelity
97. Ed and his Dead Mother
96. Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Dead
95. Funny Bones
94. L.A. Story
93. Chasing Amy
92. Mighty Aphrodite
91. 67 King Pin
90. 64 Spinal Tap
89. The Freshman
88. 96 Four Weddings and A Funeral
87. 91 Revenge of the Nerds
86. 33 Clerks
85. 16 Old School
84. 37 Dodgeball
83. 32 Groundhog Day
82. 13 Naked Gun Series
81. 10 Arthur
80. 4 There’s Something About Mary
79. 95 Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle
78. The Ref
77. 76 Ghostbusters
76. Real Genius
75. Fletch
74. My Favorite Year
73. Diner
72. Hot Fuzz
71. PCU
70. 22 Beverly Hills Cop
69. 72 Moonstruck
68. Twins
67. Love Actually
66. 8 The Wedding Singer
65. Saving Grace
64. Super Troopers
63. Bachelor Party
62. Monsters, Inc.
61. O' Brother Where Art Thou
60. What's New Pussycat?
59. Grosse Pointe Blank
58. A Night at the Opera
57. Men In Black
56. Army of Darkness
55. Love and Death
54. 89 Slapshot
53. 97 Happy Gilmore
52. Barbershop
51. Bowfinger

50. The Commitments
49. The Hollywood Shuffle
48. Saved!
47. 78 Bananas
46. 30 The 40-Year Old Virgin
45. 24 Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure
44. 55 Bull Durham
43. 54 Ferris Beuller’s Day Off
42. 71 Roxanne
41. 48 American Grafitti
40. 49 American Pie
39. 26 Wayne’s World
38. National Lampoon's Van Wilder
37. Harvey
36. The Odd Couple
35. 74 Trading Places
34. 31 Big Liebowski
33. Galaxy Quest
32. 65 Office Space
31. 28 Annie Hall
30. The Full Monty
29. 69 Blues Brothers
28. 53 Dr. Strangelove
27. 50 The Princess Bride
26. Arsenic and Old Lace
25. A Christmas Story
24. Shaun of the Dead
23. My Cousin Vinny
22. Death at a Funeral
21. The In-Laws (1979)
20. Hear My Song
19. Monty Python: The Life of Brian
18. 62 The Pink Panther
17. Breaking Away
16. The Philadelphia Story
15. 82 Tootsie
14. 27 A Fish Called Wanda
13. 2 Caddyshack
12. 17 M*A*S*H
11. 18 Stripes
10. 56 Young Frankenstein
9. Sleeper
8. 45 Raising Arizona
7. 42 Harold & Maude
6. 40 Monty Python and the Holy Grail
5. 6 Airplane
4. 1 Animal House
3. 9 Blazing Saddles
2. 12 The Producers
1. Some Like it Hot

Threadless again

2008-04-23T07:01:00.000-07:00

Just an interesting note...

As the handful of you that visit this site are aware, I submitted a design to Threadless to be published as a tee-shirt. It went to a public vote at 10:45 PM on Monday night. Through the first 24 hours, I received 510 votes (though I do not know how I have been rated due to the fact that the ratings are kept private until the end of the seven day public vote process).

The rate seems to have dropped off considerably, as at the time of this posting, only 11-plus hours into day two, the shirt has been ranked by only 91 people. I kind of expected this as I believe they set the voting up for the newest shirts to come up first, and then the logarithm dictating the presentation to the voters shows the shirts randomly. At least that's my theory.

The bottom line of all this (which is really an interesting market research tool), is that I won't know if they will be selling my shirt or not until next Monday.

What if your kid could really draw?

2008-04-22T08:48:00.000-07:00

This is too cool!

Vote early, vote often

2008-04-21T19:54:00.000-07:00

I don't know if you need to sign up or not, but Threadless accepted my design...

Like the title says...vote early, vote from as many different machines/accounts that will result in unique hits at their site to give me the best chance of having this published as a shirt. You'll have my undying gratitude and the opportunity to buy tee-shirts designed by yours truly.

Woohoo.

The Geek-Osterone Was Overflowing

2008-04-20T05:46:00.000-07:00

So, yesterday I went to the 2008 New York City Comic Con.

It was the first comic book convention I have been to in years. Honestly, I have never been to a convention anywhere near the size of this one. It was huge. It was chaotic. It was crowded. It was kind of a kick. And yes, that is a storm trooper on a NYC street off to the right there.

The floor where the vendors sat was a bit of a pain due to the crowds, but the people-watching was fascinating. All sorts of fans dressed as everything from Alice in Resident Evil: Apocalypse, to the Alan Scott (Golden Age) Green Lantern. On a side note - someone who is 50 pounds overweight should not dress in spandex - not a shot at the man dressed as Alan Scott who was actually in very good shape.

While there I picked up a few items for the family - stuffed animal for Calliope, a Supergirl and a J'onn J'onz action figure, and a Bizarro tee for my wife. Me? I got a bunch of my old Silver Age comics signed by the likes of comic-book legends Dick Ayers, Joe Sinnott, and Ramona Fradon.

Next time I go to one of these things, however, I think I'll spend more time at some of the panel discussions. I attended the Grant Morrison panel this time with my brother-in-law and old high school friend Rachel. The man was absolutely fascinating.

While there, because I don't make it up to the Big Apple as often as I really should, I made a brief visit to Zabars. This morning I noshed on proper New York bagels with whitefish salad.

Tonight I eat Klingon food.

Coming this week, the top 100 comedies, reworked.

My first attempt at a Threadless Tee

2008-04-13T07:11:00.000-07:00

Go check out my design at Threadless.com. I'll have more coming...

With thanks to my wife, the computer geek and my colorist, for taking my drawings and converting them to a submittable format.

100 Comedies

2008-04-09T04:33:00.000-07:00

Bravo has a program that identifies, as they bill it, the "100 Greatest Comedies of All Time." As with any list like this, it's gonna start some debate. For example, there were a number of films on this list that I felt were either far higher than they deserved to be, or just weren't funny.

There were a number of what I felt were glaring omissions, possibly none more so than the fact that there wasn't a single film that pre-dated 1963's Pink Panther on the list. No Arsenic and Old Lace, no Some Like it Hot, no Abbott and Costello, no Marx Brothers. It was like comedy didn't exist before 1963.

Here's a quick rundown of the Bravo list -

100 Anchorman
99 Birdcage
98 School of Rock
97 Happy Gilmore
96 Four Weddings and A Funeral
95 Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle
94 Waiting for Guffman
93 The Aristocrats
92 Father of the Bride
91 Revenge of the Nerds
90 Clueless
89 Slapshot
88 Team America
87 Kentucky Fried Movie
86 Zoolander
85 Dirty Rotten Scoundrels
84 Silver Streak
83 Sister Act
82 Tootsie
81 Half Baked
80 Lost in America
79 Three Amigos
78 Bananas
77 Flirting With Disaster
76 Ghostbusters
75 Dumb & Dumber
74 Trading Places
73 City Slickers
72 Moonstruck
71 Roxanne
70 The Nutty Professor
69 Blues Brothers
68 Broadcast News
67 King Pin
66 Dazed and Confused
65 Office Space
64 Spinal Tap
63 Manhattan
62 The Pink Panther
61 Election
60 When Harry Met Sally
59 Police Academy Series
58 Private Benjamin
57 Swingers
56 Young Frankenstein
55 Bull Durham
54 Ferris Beuller’s Day Off
53 Dr. Strangelove
52 Meet the Parents
51 National Lampoon’s Vacation

50 The Princess Bride
49 American Pie
48 American Grafitti
47 9 to 5
46 The Incredibles
45 Raising Arizona
44 Sixteen Candles
43 What About Bob
42 Harold & Maude
41 Austin Powers
40 Monty Python and the Holy Grail
39 Mrs. Doubtfire
38 Best in Show
37 Dodgeball
36 Good Morning Vietnam
35 Beetlejuice
34 Rushmore
33 Clerks
32 Groundhog Day
31 Big Leobowski
30 The 40-Year Old Virgin
29 Legally Blonde
28 Annie Hall
27 A Fish Called Wanda
26 Wayne’s World
25 Meet the Fockers
24 Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure
23 Big
22 Beverly Hills Cop
21 Shampoo
20 The Jerk
19 The Wedding Crashers
18 Stripes
17 M*A*S*H
16 Old School
15 Fast Times at Ridgemont High
14 Napoleon Dynamite
13 Naked Gun Series
12 The Producers
11 PeeWee’s Big Adventure
10 Arthur
9 Blazing Saddles
8 The Wedding Singer
7 Ace Ventura, Pet Detective
6 Airplane
5 South Park
4 There’s Something About Mary
3 Shrek
2 Caddyshack
1 Animal House

Personally, I feel that there are a number of films that were left off this list that are considerably funnier than quite a few that made it. As I would love to hear what others think about what should and shouldn't be on the list, but I don't want to prejudice the process with what I feel doesn't belong, I'm simply going to note off the top of my head some films that I believe deserve a place on the list. Later I will note the films I will compile my own list, eliminating those films I don't believe deserve to be here.

For my purposes, I will not eliminate those films that came out after this show premiered.

For now, here are 46 candidates that should at least have been considered, or be on the list that didn't make the cut....

Arsenic and Old Lace
Army of Darkness
A Night at the Opera
Bachelor Party
Barbershop
Bowfinger
Breaking Away
Chasing Amy
A Christmas Story
The Commitments
Death at a Funeral
Diner
Ed and his Dead Mother
Fletch
The Full Monty
Funny Bones
Galaxy Quest
Grosse Pointe Blank
Harvey
Hear My Song
High Fidelity
The Hollywood Shuffle
Hot Fuzz

The In-Laws (1979)
Love, Actually
Monty Python: The Life of Brian
Monty Python: The Meaning of Life
Mel Brooks' The History of the World, Part 1
Men In Black
My Cousin Vinny
My Favorite Year
National Lampoon's Van Wilder
The Odd Couple
O' Brother Where Art Thou
The Philadelphia Story
PCU
Real Genius
The Ref
Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Dead
Saved!
Saving Grace
Shaun of the Dead
Sleeper
Some Like it Hot
Three O'Clock High
What's New Pussycat?

Jeezit!

2008-04-07T06:00:00.001-07:00

From LookyDaddy!

Peep show!

2008-03-13T09:51:00.001-07:00

You know you're a redneck...

2008-03-04T10:38:00.000-08:00

If Your Wife Is Quoted In The Local Paper Saying...

And what the hell did you do today...

2008-03-04T06:39:00.000-08:00

This dude is running a marathon.

He's only 101.

Oh, and he also has 17 kids, writes for FHM (a men's magazine), recently started a new job as a plumber, and had a hit single with his band last year.

Story here.

Best Sports Picture of the Year

2008-03-04T06:36:00.000-08:00

Story here.

This is science?

2008-02-20T17:55:00.000-08:00

http://objectiveministries.org/creation/sciencefair.html

"I feel awesome," he said. "I feel like the Pats now."

2008-01-15T08:49:00.000-08:00

This dude is an idiot.

Arse Antlers!? Hah!

2008-01-11T07:36:00.000-08:00

Australish Definitions

arse antlers- tattoo in that fashionable area above the buttocks.

butt bra- raises the profile of the buttocks to go with your arse antlers.

manscaping- refers to removal of body hair for men, sometimes tied to the female preoccupation with the "lady garden," or pubic zone.

tanorexia- refers to an obsession with a suntan.

salad dodger- an obese person.

Great Firewall of China- refers to the block preventing Chinese internet users from accessing online sites deemed undesirable by the Chinese government.

She told him she was in "retail"

2008-01-10T08:05:00.000-08:00

(hideous pun intended)

A Polish man got the shock of his life when he visited a brothel and spotted his wife among the establishment's employees. Polish tabloid Super Express said the woman had been making some extra money on the side while telling her husband she worked at a store in a nearby town.

Okay, this is weird.

2008-01-10T07:59:00.000-08:00

Eyebrows were raised in the House of Commons on Thursday when a motion calling for the Church of England to be disestablished was listed with the number 666, symbol of the AntiChrist.

Somewhere in the Garden State a warden is saying, "that's the last time I show the Shawshank Redemption to the inmates on movie night."

2007-12-17T12:58:00.000-08:00

An AP story ganked from CNN.com -

Pinups of bikini-clad women hid jailbreak route, officials say

ELIZABETH, New Jersey (AP) -- Two inmates escaped from a county jail, hiding the holes they made in the walls by putting up photos of bikini-clad women, officials said.

Otis Blunt, left, and Jose Espinosa escaped from the Union County jail Saturday night, officials say.

Authorities searched over the weekend for Jose Espinosa, who was awaiting sentencing for manslaughter, and Otis Blunt, who was facing robbery and other charges. They also launched a review of jail security.
The two got out of the Union County jail Saturday evening. The county prosecutor's office said the two apparently removed cement blocks from two walls, squeezed through the openings, jumped to a rooftop below and then made it over a 25-foot-high fence. The section they escaped from was supposed to be the most secure area of the facility.
"I'm extremely disturbed that a jail with the capability of security it has would foster a breach of this nature," County Prosecutor Theodore Romankow told The Star-Ledger of Newark for Monday's editions.
Espinosa, 20, an alleged gang member, was awaiting sentencing after pleading guilty to manslaughter in a 2005 drive-by shooting in Elizabeth. Blunt, 32, was awaiting trial on charges of robbery and weapons offenses.

The men helped cover up the break by placing dummies under their bed blankets, and hiding the wall holes with magazine photos of women in bikinis, authorities said.

Excellence in marketing...

2007-12-06T08:47:00.001-08:00

Chanukah style!

Oh. My. God.

2007-12-05T08:56:00.000-08:00

Just in case you need to let your wee ones know not to trust their local catholic priest, here's an educational coloring book!

Happy Ninja Day!

2007-12-05T05:58:00.000-08:00

Today is the second annual Ninja Day. In honor of the national holiday, I wanted to talk martial arts and...well, ninjas.

First, check out these links -

The search engine Ninja.com and the info site askaninja.com and of course a Wiki on the subject. And of course, check out the following...

The day has inspired me to talk martial arts, a subject near and dear to my heart.

I have been involved in the martial arts since I was twelve, starting with Ryu Renshi-Dan Karate. I am ranked in that, Shotokan, and modern Wushu. I have trained under Yao Li, and Hoy K. Lee (Jow Ga Kung Fu), and dabbled in Aikido and Tai Chi (what can I say...I get around).

Growing up, I used to watch the old Shaw Brothers films. Most were trash, and I knew that back then, but there are a number of great martial arts films and a number of names starring in those films now with whom many Americans have become familiar.

Here are some of my favorites -

10. Jackie Chan's Police Story - Based loosely on a true story about a cop protecting a witness for the state in a corrupt Hong Kong, this is among the best of Jackie Chan's films which tend to be entertaining, but cliched. This is as much police drama as it is martial arts action film.

9. The Crow - I suppose you could make an argument that this isn't technically a martial arts film. I, on the other hand, would argue that it is. Brandon Lee, Bruce Lee's son, died in a tragic on set accident when the residual remains of a bullet left in the barrel of a gun acted like a projectile when the blank behind it was activated, pushing the cartridge remains out like a bullet, and into Lee's gut.
It was, by far and away, Lee's best film and would likely have led to other roles. That said, there are some great action sequences, and the fights, while raw and lacking the precision of most martial arts films, are well choreographed.

8. The Legend of Drunken Master - Jackie Chan, the clown prince of the martial arts, starred in this humorous and entertaining look at Wong Fei Hung, China's hero of legend. Some great fight sequences featuring drunken fist.

7. Once Upon a Time in China - One of Jet Li's earliest historical martial arts epics surrounding the stories told of national hero Wong Fei Hung. A very different look at the same martial artist that inspired the previously noted Jackie Chan comedy. Directed by legendary Chinese director Tsui Hark.

6. Fearless - Billed as Jet Li's final martial arts epic, this film goes back to the roots of the international Wushu Federation. There is a definite similarity in the story to Fist of Fury in that it deals with Japan-occupied China, and the hero of the story ends up in combat with a Japanese champion at the end of the tale. There is also something of the tale of the prodigal son to the story. Beautifully filmed piece.

5. Kung Fu Hustle - From the writer/director/star of Shaolin Soccer, this cleverly covers just about every cliche from every martial arts film ever. To top it off, it's well written, fun, silly and tense all at the same time. If you haven't seen this, you need to.

4. Unleashed - Also called Danny the Dog overseas, this might be the best acting you will ever see from Jet Li. The supporting cast includes Morgan Freeman and Bob Hoskins. This is one hell of a film.

3. Ong Bak: The Thai Warrior - Tony Jaa, quite simply is one of the most impressive martial artists I have ever seen. I will pop this one into the DVD player just to skip from one fight sequence to the next. One of the best ones in this film starts and ends in about four seconds.

2. Fist of Legend - A Jet Li remake of the Bruce Lee classic Fists of Fury. The climactic fight sequence was one of my favorite fight sequences in any martial arts film ever.

1. Enter The Dragon - The Bruce Lee classic. The best film he did, and the one that was supposed to launch his American career, cut tragically short by what is believed to be a aneurysm. The movie itself was supposed to give the world an Asian super-spy, James Bond without the gadgets. It even inspired the great parody "Fist Full of Yen," in the John Landis comedy Kentucky Fried Movie.

Honorable mentions (ie: depending on my mood, many of these could bump almost anyone of the above off the above list) -

House of Flying Daggers
Jet Li's Hero
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
Shaolin Soccer
Fist of Fury
The Big Boss
The Bodyguard (Tom yum goong)
Magnificent Butcher
Wheels on Meals
Black Mask
Batman Begins
Equilibrium

For those of you not familiar with the last one, a Christian Bale movie, I give you the gun kata...

Christmas on the idiot box

2007-12-03T06:31:00.000-08:00

A little background...

I love animation, comic art, comic books and comic strips. Always have.

I love the work of Gerald Scarfe, Ralph Bakshi, the work of Hayao Miyazaki, and the advances made by Pixar. Growing up a ten minute drive from the Museum of Cartoon Art when it was located in Rye Brook, NY, I would wander the exhibits for hours, and spend time sitting in the viewing rooms watching things like the old Max Fleischer Superman cartoons (absolutely brilliant animation, by the way).

For me, as a youth, part of the magic of the holidays (be it Easter, Halloween, Thanksgiving, or Christmas), was the animated specials. For me, there have been a handful of greats, some classic, some relatively new, but destined to be classic.

These are, for my money, the best animated Christmas specials...

10. South Park - Technically, this isn't a Christmas special done for television, but was an animated short done for animation festivals like Spike and Mike's, and is directed at adults. But there are few Christmas related things funnier than the scene in this first South Park animated piece when Jesus shows up and yells at Santa, "Kringle, you ruined my birthday!" To which Claus replies, "there can be only one," as he whips out a samurai sword.

9. Frosty the Snowman - Not my cup of tea anymore, but a sweet piece about the enchantment and magic of Christmas for any kid.

8. Year Without a Santa Claus - Gotta give this one props for bringing us the cultural icons Heat and Cold Miser. I still find myself occasionally singing the Heat Miser song.

7. Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer - Five words...The Land of Misfit Toys. I don't think I need to say anything else.

6. A Claymation Christmas Celebration -This was a result of the annoying California Raisin commercials in the 1980's and they do indeed make an appearance. In spite of that, this is a pretty entertaining collection of Christmas carols coordinated to claymation.

5. Bugs Bunny Christmas Carol - Actually, not the big BB at his best, but still an entertaining endeavor from Warner Brothers' big animated star.

4. Justice League: Comfort and Joy - If you haven't caught this one, find it. This is amongst the best of the animated series Christmas specials. Nothing says Christmas like the Flash and the Ultra-Humanite.

3. How the Grinch Stole Christmas - The classic Seussian Christmas complete with song and narration from Frankenstein himself, Boris Karloff.

2. A Wish for Wings that Work - Of all, probably my favorite, and the one I think as the best. Based on the Berkeley Breathed kids book, this features old Bloom County favorites Opus and Bill the Cat in a story as much about accepting who you are, as it is about the goodwill of the season.

1. A Charlie Brown Christmas - The sentimental favorite, the music and story is tinged with that little bit of angst that creeps in to the edges of the season for so many. More religious than I tend to like for a holiday that co-opted the pagan celebration of the winter solstice, but it still comes back to the goodwill message of Christmas. Besides...it's Charlie Brown.

Yeah, the Simpsons had some good episodes, and there were other South Park episodes, but right now, these are what I'm putting on my list. I'm sure I've forgotten shows I would want to include on the list, but anything I missed, feel free to remind me.

For the month before Christmas...

2007-11-29T12:24:00.000-08:00

Tis the season! Mulled apple cider, the smell of pine and chestnuts roasting over an open fire (always sounded like a euphemism to me for the emasculation of the masses by retail America at this time of year...or is that too cynical?).

But for the film minor that I was, this presents a wonderful time of year with classics like A Christmas Story, It Happened One Night, and Frank Capra's It's a Wonderful Life. I make it a point every year to watch A Christmas Story and It's a Wonderful Life - but at the same time it's also a brutal time for film-goers with saccharine fare like 1990's A Mom For Christmas starring Olivia Newton-John, or 1941's Penny Serenade. For the most part, though, I like to go a different route.

I have a fondness for the non-traditional holiday movie. Not quite Silent Night, Deadly Night or Black Christmas - but I don't mind the occasional explosion or fight sequence in my holiday entertainment (not all of them fit that mold, but most are not the first movie that comes to mind when you think Christmas).

And here is my holiday dirty dozen, my twelve favorites for the holidays (mind you, not necessarily the best, just the order in which I am most likely to re-watch) -

Die Hard - The action film that keeps on giving. It made, "Yippee-ki-yay, mother fucker," an acceptable holiday greeting. Okay, so it didn't quite do that, but it provided a cathartic outlet for the person who just came from the mall, allowing the frazzled holiday shopper to imagine their fellow shoppers as Hans Gruber plummeting from Nakatomi Tower.

The Ref - What says Christmas in America more than Dennis Leary and familial dysfunction? And it's hard to complain about a cast that includes Kevin Spacey and Judy Davis.

Trading Places - John Landis has directed two of my favorite holiday films (I always watch An American Werewolf in London around Halloween). Then there's this. The only thing that might say Christmas in America more than familial dysfunction is unbridled capitalism.

Lethal Weapon - What do the first four films on the list have in common? Guns. It's all about the Christmas violence. At least three have hostages, and two have serious violence. Don't you just love it when the in-laws get together?

Love Actually - Just a nice film that can be watched with the family. A whole bunch of stories intersect in this British comedy showing just about everything that a family or an individual might go through during the holiday season.

Millions - Another excellent British comedy that can be watched with the family, as long as the kids are of an age to understand some of the things, as this does go some places that younger kids might have a hard time understanding.

The Lion in Winter - Fans of good acting, rejoice. Just like any modern story about the holidays, this fictional chronicle of a family Christmas in the house of Henry II, and Eleanor of Aquitaine is filled with just as much dysfunction as any of the films on this list. The acting is absolutely brilliant from Peter O'Toole, Katherine Hepburn, and youngsters Anthony Hopkins and Timothy Daulton (yes, A View To a Kill, that Timothy Daulton).

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe - Kris Kringle, Father Christmas, or whatever you call him, has a showing in Narnia after the land has had 100 years of winter with no Christmas. When things look bleak, he shows up to cheer refugee children/Narnian royalty Peter, Susan, and Lucy with gifts of peace and goodwill: sword, shield, dagger, bow, arrows - you know the old saying coined by Sun Tzu, "He who aspires to peace should prepare for war."

Die Harder (DH2) - Back to good old fashioned Christmas violence.

Better Off Dead - John Cusak's Christmas classic, complete with stalker newspaper boy.

Scrooged - A competent modern retelling of Dicken's A Christmas Carol. Bill Murray is solid and entertaining, but the funniest stuff is from the supporting cast of Carol Kane, Bobcat Goldthwait, and David Johannson (Buster Poindexter).

Bad Santa - Billy Bob Thornton pretty much plays that uncle that no one wants to acknowledge they have. The guy is pretty much a screw-up, but finally gets something right. Not an uncommon story line, but done with a lot more edge than you see from most holiday films.

Cue the 1970's porn music, please

2007-11-29T05:58:00.000-08:00

So...

Last night I was watching The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe with my wife and my daughter while eating dinner. Nothing fancy - kabobbed chicken marinated in a souvlaki sauce, a sauteed melange of vegetables (tomatoes, onions, peppers, and zucchini) with some crumbled feta, and some rice pilaf. I only mention the dinner, because it is relevant to the following.

For those who have not seen the film, it is an excellent adaptation of the C.S. Lewis source work of the same name - complete with a unicorn. More on the relevance of the unicorn momentarily.

As I mentioned, we were eating dinner while watching. Not an uncommon practice in my house - the three of us sitting in a tight grouping, my five year-old daughter between me and my wife, often discussing the movie we're watching.

By the time the movie reached the climactic battle (see picture above), my five-year old daughter and my wife had finished her dinner and moved to the couch. As I was feeding our infant daughter with one hand, and eating with the other for the first half of my dinner, I was the lone family member still eating.

I had just shoveled a fork-full of rice into my mouth when my eldest innocently asked her mother, "why is Peter on a unicorn?"

To which my wife replied, "maybe he just enjoys the smoooooth ride."

I nearly blew rice out my nose.

Happy Thanksgiving!

2007-11-23T10:05:00.001-08:00

http://entertainment.msn.com/video/playerN?pid=65UcwE6g0BrHya02xCavmnwMW5VICJN-

Not your child's cartoons...

2007-11-17T20:07:00.000-08:00

Outside of fans of the genre and the Japanese, animation has long carried the stigma of being a category of film that caters only to kids. I bring this up, because I was recently watching Ralph Bakshi's opus to this nation's popular music, American Pop, and it had me thinking - what are the best animated films with an adult target audience.

Honestly, I found the list difficult. For some reason, the animated sitcom seems to bear greater appeal for adults than feature length - The Simpsons, South Park, Family Guy, Robot Chicken, The Critic, and Futurama all came to mind quickly and easily. And for whatever reason, when these shows have attempted feature length film versions, all have been weak (I know a lot of people liked Bigger, Longer, and Uncut, but I found it to be a half-hour episode with a lot of boring filler that made it closer to 90 minutes - I was highly disappointed).

I noticed as I worked on this list that half of films that came to mind were foreign, and that the more recent it got, the more likely the piece was foreign.

10. Fantasia - When you really think about it, this is really nothing more than a really pretty music video for classical music. There is no overlying nor underlying storyline, just a lot of animation that was years ahead of its time. A pretty strong argument can be made that this is targeting children, however, I have to admit, I gained a greater appreciation of the film as I got older.

9. Wizards - Fascinating piece done by American animator Ralph Bakshi. Bakshi is clearly making an editorial statement about war, and propaganda with a heavy reliance on Nazi imagery to make his point. Inconsistent and sometimes slow, this movie is definitely worth watching.

If you're an animation fan and you have missed this one, find it.

8. Heavy Metal - Flawed, but fun. More promising than it delivered, this anthology took stories from the earliest issues of the magazine and linked them with the common element of the "lochnar," an ancient artifact of evil. The movie featured art and stories from the likes of Moebius and Richard Corben.

Heavy Metal suffers from a problem common to anthologies: inconsistency. The Moebius and Corben pieces are pretty to look at, but lack the substance and entertainment value of some of the other pieces.

Unfortunately, the movie's sequel, Heavy Metal 2000, was lacking in the promise of the first.

7. Wicked City - This mid-1980's Japanese horror-noir piece is often acknowledged by fans of manga and anime genre as a seminal piece of Japanimation, influencing everything and everyone from films like Urotsukidoji and La Blue Girl to Todd MacFarlane's Spawn. Demons and cops - how can you miss?

6. Cowboy Bebop: The Movie - From the Japanese series of the same name, the movie follows bounty hunter, or cowboy, Spike and his co-horts on the trail of a terrorist on a bio-formed moon of one of the solar system's other planets (at one point in the series Spike asks one of his cadre who is returning to Earth why she would want to go to "that pit.") More a thriller than an action film, this is not for those looking for a shoot 'em up action-fest. Think taut detective drama with action.

This easily could have been done as live action, as could several of the films on this list, however, I really believe that any of these done as live action would have lost something.

5. Akira - One of the first feature length pieces of Anime that I ever saw, and (from my own stand-point) a fascinating study on the deep seated lingering cultural impact of the bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki on the Japanese psyche. Adapted from the comic book of the same name, Akira was revolutionary when it came out.

At the time, the leading American animation house (Disney) utilized three-layer animation (three cells to create the effect of depth). Akira used five. It created a richness and depth of motion not previously seen in American animated films.

As for the story - that's a little more difficult. Let's just say that the government is messing with forces they don't completely understand.

4. The Incredibles - This one making the list I see as the most likely to create arguments, as I think this is the only one that people might view as a kids film. That said, the movie borrows heavily from Alan Moore's Watchmen and deals with a number of adult themes, including the concept of sacrifice for the greater good.

Death is not treated with kid gloves in this piece - although it is at times treated comically ("no capes!"). Nor is the mid-life crisis of Mr. Incredible which nearly destroys his family.

3. American Pop - In my opinion, the best of Bakshi's films, American Pop follows four generations of the same family and its relationship with American popular music from the early part of the 20th century until approximately 1980. In typical Bakshi form, the man utilized his patented roto-scoping technique to integrate live action with his animation to great effect.

If you haven't seen this one, find it.

2. Princess Mononoke - The Miyazaki environmental masterpiece is beautiful, violent, bloody, and gentle all at the same time. It is a story with a hero, but no true villain - unless ignorance is counted as a villain. It is as much about preserving and honoring the past, as it is about accepting the change that the future brings.

Like Akira, this film is touched by the cultural impact of the atomic bombs, but with a less bleak outlook for humanity.

I have probably watched this film a half dozen times and it never gets old.

1. The Triplets of Belleville - Were it not for this piece of French animation, Mononoke would have garnered the top spot. Belleville is strange and wild, as much an homage to the animation of the 1920's and 30's as it is a nod to those who ride in bicycling's biggest race - the Tour de France.

A deserving winner of the Best Animated Feature Oscar, this film is fascinating not only for its beautiful animation and story, but for the fact that through the course of the entire film there might be a total of five lines of dialog.

Not to be missed.

I spent a lot of time considering other films - The Simpsons Movie, Beavis and Butthead Do America, even hybrids like Cool World and even The Wall - but either the movies themselves fell short, or, in the case of The Wall, really lacked enough animation to be considered animated. Other pieces like The Animatrix, and Titan AE were filled with promise, but the creators' ambition failed to live up to the promise.

Granted, I have yet to see Beowulf, and recent attempts at the adult audience with films like A Scanner Darkly, but this is my list, and I am sticking by it until I see better.

Yet another meme...

2007-11-16T10:16:00.000-08:00

4 jobs I've had:
Reporter
Stunt coordinator (music video)
Martial Arts instructor
High School English Teacher

4 movies I love to watch over and over:
All That Jazz
The Outlaw Josey Wales
Princess Mononoke
Lawrence of Arabia

4 places I have lived:
Chappaqua, NY
Boston, MA
Williamsburg, VA
Frederick, MD

4 TV shows I enjoy watching:
Scrubs
Eureka
Battlestar Galactica
Heroes

4 places I have been:
New Orleans, LA
Portland, ME
Venice, Italy
Aachen, Germany

4 websites I visit daily:
si.com
boston.com/
thecoffincorner.blogspot.com
bostonherald.com

4 favorite foods:
Chicken Scarpariello
Pizza
Beer (I write about it for a brewing newspaper, I better like it)
Chocolate Chip Cookies

4 places I would rather be:
Maine
Ireland
Massachusetts
New Orleans

30 Days of Undead on a Plane...

2007-11-10T07:46:00.001-08:00

I meant to talk about this shortly after I saw it. A couple of weeks ago I saw 30 Days of Night. The adaptation of the graphic novel is a worthy addition to the horror lexicon.

The movie was thoroughly entertaining from beginning to end - and this is coming from somebody who is not really a Josh Hartnett fan.

Outside of Hartnett, the film is largely filled with character actors of the "I recognize that guy, but I don't know from where,"-type. Unless you're a serious film fanatic, you won't place anyone of them, but you will recognize them.

The vampires themselves were, as my wife said, truly frightening, and completely lacking of humanity. This wasn't one of those tales of tragic love like Dracula, or even Fright Night, in which the vampire encounters one who looks like the long lost lover. This is a tale about predator, prey, and survival - and we're no longer the top of the food chain.

While I enjoyed the first two Blade films, those were really action films. This might have been the best vampire horror film that has come out of American cinema since Near Dark in 1987 (but still not quite on par with Russia's Nightwatch).

Flight of the Living Dead...

From Snakes on a Plane to Zombies on a Plane. Surprisingly well acted, and decently written, this latest entrant into the zombie genre is good fun for fans of the undead. The movie feels a little long in the set-up, as a 747 heading to Paris runs into a major storm front while carrying some questionable cargo.

Of course, that cargo gets loose and starts eating passengers.

Once the zombies are on the loose, look for the stewardesses carrying body parts in their mouths. Some of the best scenes ever.

Personally, I feel that this was more deserving of a theatrical release than Snakes on a Plane. C'est la mort.

Memed again...

2007-11-09T05:49:00.000-08:00

So my wife memed me. I have to come up with eight random facts about me...

1. I love football. I played and/or coached for approximately seven seasons. The same number of seasons that I ran track, and played in little league. This upcoming year will see me playing my tenth season of Australian football.

2. The only athletic endeavor which I have been involved with longer is the martial arts which I started around the age of twelve and practiced regularly until I was 31. After a six year hiatus I have started teaching Kung-Fu again on a weekly basis. All-told, I have been at it for 20 of the last 25 years.

3. Growing up I never thought I would live south of the Mason Dixon line for any truly extended period of time. Boy, was I wrong.

4. I miss Portland, ME and have been gone from the New England city for too long.

5. Every year that the Aussie rules season starts, I think "this year's gonna be the last." I've thought that for about the last four. It never seems to take.

6. My wife is a hobbit fetishist - that's how we ended up dating in the first place.

7. I have interviewed Steve Sabol, and Olympic participants Bela Karolyi, Shannon Miller (gymnastics), and Kate Sobrero (soccer).

8. Somehow my journalistic career has taken me from writing about sports to writing about beer. It's not bad work if you can get it.

As always, these things die here with me.

Nailed with a meme

2007-11-05T10:51:00.000-08:00

My wife's friend Anna nailed me with the following meme regarding books...

Total number of books:

Easily in excess of 1000.

Last book I read:

Currently I am reading both I Am Legend by Richard Matheson and Living to Tell the Tale by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. The last completed was Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows.

Last book I bought:

Technically, Kelly bought the Harry Potter...off hand, I would say Living to Tell the Tale.

5 Meaningful Books:

Let's see...five meaningful books, and I can't repeat anything Kelly had. Well that's just a nuisance considering I'm the one who introduced her to Matt Ruff, and I know I've read the book more times than she has. Since I can't use Fool on the Hill, guess I'll have to dig deep on this one -

One Hundred Years of Solitude - Marquez. Read this for the first time in college. Absolutely brilliant.

The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien. Probably have read the trilogy (which I am counting as one book) close to two-dozen times. It never gets old. And if you're not impressed by a guy that has created a whole world, with history, different cultures, languages with gramatical structures, then you're just not worth my time.

Childhood's End - Arthur C. Clarke. Brilliant piece regarding mankind's evolution. One of a handful of books that I was exposed to in high school that had an impact on me.

Zorba the Greek - Nikos Kazantzakis. One of the other impact books from high school.

God Bless You Mr. Rosewater - Kurt Vonnegut. My favorite from an author from whom I have a hard time picking a favorite. In the writer's universe of dark satire, there's something I always found to be gentle and nostalgic about this book.

Not much into tagging others, so in my case, the meme stops here...

In Honor of Halloween

2007-10-30T06:39:00.000-07:00

My apologies to my handful of readers out there, I have been remiss. In honor of the impending holiday, I wish to address a few entertainment items for All Hallows...

First and foremost, I am inspired to take issue with this list at time.com. This is a list of the top 25 horror movies and includes Shaun of the Dead and Bambi. I understand the argument for SotD, but feel that it's like including Scary Movie, or Young Frankenstein on a horror film list - not a horror film, belongs there about as much a...well...Bambi for Christ's sake. Bambi!? This list completely loses credibility.

This list, however, has inspired me to do the following three lists - top ten horror parodies/comedies, top ten vampire films, and top ten horror films. You won't see films like Audition (torture porn), or un-scary splatter-fests like Dead Alive (I know those that like this film, just not one making my list because I never found it to be the least bit scary. Messy and gross does not equal horror). I don't necessarily have an issue with blood in horror - I just think there's a certain line where it stops being complimentary and starts being ridiculous - but that's just me.

Some of my criteria include how the film has aged, whether or not the film is legitimately scary, how willing I am to rewatch the film, and sometimes just a gut feeling.

Here we go -

Top ten horror parody/comedies -

10. Dead and Breakfast - This bad, low budget zombie film makes no pretense about being anything other than a bad, low budget horror film, and even makes fun of that fact. However, it is bad enough that it would not even have made the list were it not for an absolute genius soundtrack from Zacharias and the Lobos Riders being sung by the movie's very own pseudo-Greek Chorus.

9. Love at First Bite - Probably the only one on the list that is definitively dated, but also still the only funny vampire parody/comedy (don't get me started on the travesty that is Dracula: Dead and Loving It). To this day, Arte Johnson, the first Renfield outside of the Bela Lugosi Dracula that I can remember seeing, remains my favorite Renfield.

8. Buffy the Vampire Slayer - The original with Kristy Swanson and Donald Sutherland, I think is an under-rated comedy. Don't get me wrong - it wasn't a great film, but it had its moments. And quite honestly, it demonstrated a gift for comedy that I didn't think Luke Perry had in him.

7. Scary Movie 3 - For my money, the best of the Scary Movie series. Of course it takes aim at an easy target in Shamalan's Signs. Of course there are a number of other movies parodied, including The Ring, but among the can't miss scenes are the movie's openning with Jenny McCarthy and Pam Anderson who has a much better sense of humor about herself than any would initially expect.

6. Murder Party - This low budget horror/comedy has a brilliant "MacGyver" moment that just shouldn't be missed. Sure, this movie that looks like it was shot on a shoe-string gets off to a slow start, but once the protagonist gets to the party, the film really takes off.

5. Ed and His Dead Mother -Miriam Margolyes steals this pseudo-zombie film from her co-stars Steve Buscemi and Ned Beatty. Totally worth the rental and the hour and a half required to view.

4. Slither - Another zombie film complete with alien invaders. What is it about zombies and comedy? Nothing as funny as rotting flesh, brain-eating humans? No matter, this over-the top piece of film-making is a fun ride.

3. Army of Darkness - Any of you primitive screw-head horror fans out there that haven't seen this, then don't waste my time arguing with my list. This isn't an optional film for horror fans - it's compulsory, so if you haven't seen it, don't get back to me until you do.

2. Young Frankenstein - For a long time this Mel Brooks classic has been the standard against which all horror parodies needed to be measured. It remains one of the most brilliant parodies, not just horror parodies, but parodies of all time, and a strong argument can be made that it should still be number one. However, for my money, I give you number one...

1. Shaun of the Dead - British actor/writer Simon Pegg gave us the quintessential Zombedy. There are none better than this, and the tributes to the greats of the zombie-genre are both clever and funny. Not a horror film, but certainly a top ten zombie film.

The beauty about the sub-genres of horror, such as vampire or zombie films, is that the movies aren't necessarily horror films. For example, what we see as horror now tends to be suspense filled and violent. Seventy years ago when Bela Lugosi played Dracula, the monsters were almost sympathetic, tragic figures in what was almost like Greek tragedy. That said, here are, in my opinion, the ten best vampire flicks of all time...

10. John Carpenter's Vampires - Not really a good film, per se, but it kept me thoroughly entertained. There are a number of holes, and the occasional reliance on the contrived, but James Woods is very watchable as a vampire-hunter with a chip on his shoulder.

9. 30 Days of Night - I'm not positive that this belongs, just because I'm not positive it has staying power. However, this was something new and different in a genre that's often plagued by a rehashing of the same thing over and over. Personally, I thought it was worth the price of admission and I would go see it again. It was, I think, the best vampire film since the first two Blade films - and if it ages well, I would venture to say it's better than either.

8. Blade/Blade II - Not without problems, but certainly entertaining action flicks. Blade II might be the better of the two, with the vampire that preys on other vampires a great surprise at the opening of the flick. As for why I list the two together - I don't rightly know, but it just feels right to me to keep these two as one film.

7. Fright Night - A Halloween favorite of mine, I love breaking this one out to watch this time of year. Honestly, Chris Sarandon makes a great vampire, both intimidating and charismatic at the same time.

6. The Hunger - Well acted, well put together rookie effort from Tony Scott with a tres memorable scene between a young Susan Sarandon and Catherine Deneuve. Also a bit of a different twist on the genre.

5. From Dusk 'til Dawn - I put this on my list in spite of the fact I feel that the movie is weak until George Clooney knocks Quentin Tarantino out. After that things really pick up. Honestly, this film would probably make the list based on Salma Hayek's costuming alone. I know straight women that were turned on by her in that. Satanico Pandemonium could bite me on my ass any day...or night as the case may be.

4. Cronos - Some early work from Guillermo Del Toro (his second film on the list along with Blade II), Cronos feels more like a Grimm's Fairytale than your classic vampire film. Definitely worth a look.

3. Near Dark - A personal favorite, this film pretty much avoids use of the term vampire, and creates its own mythology. Utilizing what feels like half the cast of Aliens, this piece from James Cameron's ex features Lance Henriksen as one of the most evil MF vampires you will ever see.

2. Dracula - The tragic tale of Vlad Dracul as portrayed by the iconic Bela Lugosi is still and always will be a great film. If you have a problem with this one, you just don't know film.

1. Nosferatu - The original Murnau silent film was brilliant, and comes with a worthy 1979 remake. This silent piece of horror genius contained a brilliantly creepy Count Orlock as played by Max Schreck with make-up that still influences that of make-up artists currently working in the genre. The only vampire film worthy of being ranked higher than the Carl Laemle classic with Lugosi.

Now, ten must see horror films. For my money, these are the best there ever were...

10. 28 Days Later - Technically, not a zombie film. However, it might be the most influential film on that sub-genre since George Romero's Night of the Living Dead. The sequel is worth a look too.

9. Silence of the Lambs - The first horror film that I ever saw after which I felt dirty. Anthony Hopkins actually makes a serial-killing cannibal...charismatic. You find yourself both horrified by his actions during his escape and rooting for him at the same time. When done watching the film and you have the opportunity to analyze what you just watched...well, that's when the dirty feeling slips in. Just brilliant.

8. Phantom of the Opera - Lon Chaney sacrificed for his art, using wires and putty to contort his face into disturbing, painful fright-masks. This, like Murnau's Noseferatu, should be viewed by anyone that sees themselves as a horror buff/historian. Sure, it's a little dated in the over-the-top nature of silent film acting, but what Chaney did with prosthetic make-up work was so far ahead of its time, this film is a must-see.

7. Dracula - What can I say about the Laemle piece that hasn't already been said.

6. Psycho - This begins a series of seminal horror films that each changed the face of the genre. Without Hitchcock's Ted Gein inspired suspense-thriller, films like Silence of the Lambs, and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre never get made. Tony Perkins plays Norman Bates with a disarming, boyish charm that is just as disturbing as Anthony Hopkin's charismatic cannibal, Hannibal Lechter.

5. Night of the Living Dead - The seminal zombie film, and a horror film socially conscious on a previously unseen level. It was a horror film with a social conscience, that made a concerted effort to comment on race relations in America in the 1960's. It dealt with issues of isolation, communication, hate, and the mindless drone mentality of the establishment.

4. Hellraiser/Hellbound: Hellraiser II - Arguably the most original conception of Hell and the Devil since the inception of film. This, to me, has always akin to Dante's Gates of Hell - something we hadn't previously seen. It's a shame that it has been marred by a series of mediocre to piss-poor sequels.

3. The Exorcist - Sure, the special effects could probably use an updating, but outside of that, this film could have come out, pretty much as it is, last year and it still would have been hailed as one of the best horror films of all time. I could easily list this (or my next) as my number one.

2. Alien - This Ridley Scott sci-fi/horror classic might very well have spawned more college thesis in regards to horror and rape than any other film out there. It was also the first instance of a truly strong female hero in a boogey-man/monster-under-the-bed sort of movie, and spawned a series of female bad-asses throughout the genre.

1. The Shining - It is the horror film that I can't turn off, no matter where I come into it. Quite simply the best ghost story of all time, and if Stephen King can't figure out that Stanley Kubrik made one of the greatest films of all time, then it's his loss. I still can't believe the POS that King attached his name to on the SciFi Channel a couple of years ago. What a travesty that was.

And we all know how long its been...

2007-09-09T15:49:00.000-07:00

since an original story idea has been used at the movies or in books. For example:

Via http://funnyimagedump.com/

Faaabulous Pt 2.

2007-08-16T17:32:00.000-07:00

"Spartan!"

No fair that you are the only one that gets to comment on 300.

I myself have not seen many movies this year, but I found 300 completely entertaining. A good movie? Frak, no. But damn enjoyable to watch. Why? I'll give you a few reasons:

1. Half-naked, well-built men. (okay, so maybe you weren't as into this as I was. Being male at all. Then again, if you were watching 300, maybe you do...)
2. Lots and lots of violence. Hee, hee!
3. Getting to yell "Spartan!" A lot.
4. Boiled skulls!

That last argument comes from the same guys that brought MST3K to you. You can download a riff track here, sync it to your DVD player, and listen to commentary so brilliant, it made 300 worth watching a second time. And darn it, looks like I am going to have to sit through Battlefield Earth and Star Wars: Episode I again.

In short, if you have nothing to do on a Friday night, grab a case of beer and drink every time you 1) hear someone yell "Sparta!" or some variation or 2) see blood fly in slow motion. If you aren't enjoying it, you'll be out cold within 20 minutes.

(In all seriousness, it actually wasn't a terrible adaptation of the graphic novel. There are a few changes that were made to flesh it out some but which I considered unnecessary. The narration was irritating. Otherwise, though, the graphic novel pretty much acts like a storyboard for the movie. )

Bourne again, and other observations

2007-08-13T09:52:00.000-07:00

Over the last month I have managed to catch Live Free or Die Hard, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, and The Bourne Ultimatum (in addition to DVD releases Hotel Rwanda, and 300 - neither of which I will address here). The three that I caught in the cinema were thoroughly entertaining. Surprisingly, I think the best of the three was the fourth installment of Die Hard.

Don't get me wrong - all were entertaining summer fare, and none were without problems - but the issues I had with LFDH didn't jar me out of the film, or force me out of the moment the way the issues with Potter and Bourne did.

Here it is in a capsule - would I recommend all three films? Yes - they were all well paced an highly enjoyable, and I would recommend them in the order in which I listed them in the first paragraph.

LFDH is arguably the best Die Hard film since the first one. Justin Long as the sidekick in what is essentially a buddy-action flick was a great addition as he and Willis play well off of each other. The addition of John McLane's college-age daughter was a pleasant surprise considering my expectation that it would be one of the movie's weaknesses.

Kevin Smith, on the other hand, I would say was one of the movie's weaknesses, and there were some minor plot issues. Beyond that, the movie was solid.

Order of the Phoenix was fairly well done for the most part, however, the movie lacked character development of the new characters it introduced like Tonks who will become more relevant in subsequent movies and there were moments that the special effects regressed to the looks of those in Sorcerer's Stone - particularly in the case of Grawp, Hagrid's brother. Grawp was rendered in a cartoonish manner that I have not seen since the troll in the bathroom.

It was jarring to say the least.

However, we were introduced to Dolores Umberage as played by Imelda Staunton. Staunton couldn't have been any more perfect for the roll.

The final installment of the Bourne films is the weakest of the three - mostly based on the following - the story line lacks the meat of the first two films as Jason Bourne continues to search for his past, the chases are not as well shot as in the previous films, and fight sequences are also not as well filmed - often coming across as chaotic and confusing. In spite of the problems, it's still an enjoyable 111 minutes worth of action and intrigue and worth the price of admission.

Faaabulous

2007-08-05T18:22:00.000-07:00

A brief word about the adaptation of Frank Miller's 300 which I recently watched on DVD.

As bad as it was, I am glad I saw it, if for no other reason than to be able to give the film the following one sentence review -

It is the best unintentional comedy to hit the screens since Showgirls.

That is all.

A Nude Rue McClanahan

2007-07-17T19:27:00.000-07:00

Now did that catch your attention or are you still clawing out your eyes in pain and anguish?

She's not really nude actually, but you can catch Rue McClanahan stripping in the 1968 Hollywood After Dark, with film commentary provided by Mike and the 'bots from Mystery Science Theater 3000-only it is not really "Mike and the 'bots" but rather "Mike and the human 'bot incarnations." This is part of their new (hopefully series) Film Crew project which my Mike and I rented from Netflix.

Hollywood After Dark, like most MST3K films, is incredibly painful to watch on its own, but entirely amusing with MST3K-style razzing. I think the movie itself has something to do with a bipolar junkyard supervisor/hipster/strip club administrator finding love and committing some type of crime for a man with rabbit teeth. I think someone gets killed with a lamp. Anyways, Rue places the love interest and there is a lot of stripping. Scary, scary stripping.

The host segments pretty much suck but to MST3K fans, it is gratifying to know-it's back. And with naughty language too!

But also a semi-clad Rue McClanahan.

And everybody was Kung-fu fighting...

2007-07-15T18:49:00.000-07:00

Them cat's were fast as lightning.

Just caught Live Free or Die Hard today. It was a pretty entertaining romp through the mid-Atlantic region of the Eastern Seaboard. But I'm not really here to talk about that.

What I do want to talk about is the trailer for War, due out August 27.

For those of you who don't know me, I used to teach at the Boston Kung-fu/Tai-chi Club up in the Bay State. I started training in the martial arts when I was 13 in New York, learning Ryu-Renshi Dan and Shotokan Karate. I moved on to modern Wu-shu, tinged by Hun-gar, and dabbled in Aikido and Jow-Ga. I get geeked up for good martial arts films.

Honestly, they don't even have to be that good - they just need to be entertaining.

Jet Li is one hell of a martial artist, and Statham isn't shabby, particularly for someone who first learned it, by some reports, for the movies (hell, I'd known a few who had trained for years who don't look as sharp as he does). I'm hoping it's a decent script. Even if it's not, I'm probably going to see this one. After a number of poor choices that I will write off to a lack of familiarity with the English language, Li has rebuilt his reputation with movies like Hero, Fearless, and Unleashed.

Statham was entertaining in The Transporter, and its weaker sequel, not to mention the weak scripted adrenaline-rush, Crank.

So, yes, I realize there is potential for all sorts of badness here, a-la Kiss of the Dragon, but I've already got my Martial-Arts geek on, based on the trailer I saw in front of Live Free or Die Hard. And if it sucks, come fall, I'll wash the taste out of my mouth with Balls of Fury, due out August 30.

Wait...that sounded gay, didn't it?

I got a two in three chance...

2007-07-14T05:34:00.000-07:00

65%

My Sister-in-law and Superman

2007-07-11T06:25:00.000-07:00

Recently my sister-in-law made a great observation over on her blog. She talks a little bit about the fact that the super-hero so closely associated with "the American Way," is an illegal alien, and the irony of that, given the current immigration debate.

The funny thing about Kal-el, Superman, or Clark Kent...whichever name you choose to use, is that he's not just any illegal alien. He is the ultimate illegal alien. He's not even of this world, let alone this country.

Created by Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster, both sons of Jewish immigrants of European descent, Superman's alien heritage can be thought of as highly symbolic of not just their backgrounds, but the backbone upon which all of the United States was built. It was no accident that the character was written as an alien.

The funny thing is, when taken as a whole - the heroes we read about in the comic books as we grew up were all criminals. Just look at DC's line-up - Superman, Wonder Woman, and J'onn J'onzz were all illegal immigrants, or aliens. All, including Batman, Green Lantern, The Flash, and others, are vigilantes - behavior considered criminal by law.

Consider the further irony of the saber-rattlers who wrap themselves in the flag and call for English to be declared the official language, and who want to close our borders. Let's just take English. Last I checked, they speak German in Germany, Japanese in Japan, and Italian in Italy - yet in America, we speak English - a language this country inherited from another country. If we really want to be AMERICAN, maybe we should look at the languages and dialects of the Cherokee, or Sioux, or Huron.

They were here long before whites...which brings me to my next point.

We are the cast-offs of the rest of the world, other country's refuse. Without immigration, legal or otherwise, we would not have Albert Einstein (would not have won World War II), Ayn Rand, Carnegie-Mellon University, John F. Kennedy, pizza, or hot dogs (a close relative of the German bratwurst). Those are just a fraction of the things and people we would be without. Hell, even our language is a mish-mash of German, French, Latin, and the old Anglo-Saxon languages.

Let's look at, say, Ron Lewandowski - a regional director with the Minutemen, a self-appointed group of America's protectors. The last time I checked, Lewandowski was a Polish name. Not exactly Native American, if you know what I mean.

Personally, I have grandparents who arrived on these shores by way of Italy and Ireland.

Is there a better way for these people to come into the country? It's hard to say - but I do know that trying to close our borders and rounding up millions of illegal immigrants is kind of like sticking your thumb in a leaky dike as a tsunami is about to crash.

If, as a people, we let the concept of isolationism take over and allow small minded bigots to pass legislation that destroys any chance for these people to become legal citizens, we should remove the sign from the Statue of Liberty that exhorts other countries to give us their poor, sick, and huddled masses. Remove it and replace it with a sign that reads "foreigners go home." And then we should tell the writers throughout the comic book industry to go to hell, because the criminals they write about don't reflect the "American Way."

Fantasy geeks rejoice

2007-06-28T14:59:00.000-07:00

What is best in life?

To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women.

It appears, according to Cinematical, that a new Conan movie may be in the plans at New Line. Cinematical reports that New Line has an 18-month window on the rights with one option to extend the rights of unreported duration.

With Conan the Governor immersed in the political machinations of California, and Mako having passed away, the casting for one of the roles that has become inexorably linked with Shwarzenegger's acting career is now wide open. I expect that the names that Hollywood will come up with for the old pulp-novel and comic book stand-by will include the likes of Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, "Stone Cold" Steve Austin, or even John Cena.

It's hard to see anyone other than Arnie in the roll...that said, it should be noted that he wasn't cast for his acting ability, or that funny look he gets on his face when he's straining really hard and gritting his teeth. He was cast for the exact same reason that anyone of those wrestling stars would be cast - because they're large, muscle bound creatures that would be a match for the physicality of the roll. Let the speculation begin.

Personally, if they had to go with one of the wrestlers, I vote for The Rock. Ten years ago I would have gone with Kevin Sorbo. If they don't want to go pro wrestler, I could also see them looking at Vin Diesel.

The more I speculate about this, the bigger a car wreck it feels like.

Comic books, the movies and the last 17 years...

2007-06-18T07:32:00.000-07:00

The better part of the last two decades have seen probably the most successful marriage of the comic book and film industries ever. Sure, there were adaptations for film and television of some of the biggest names in the comic book industry that predate 1990 - most notably the Adam West Batman series and films and the early Superman serials and the George Reeves series, not to mention the reinvention of the character in 1978 with Christopher Reeve.

Since 1990 and Tim Burton's popular butchering of Batman, we have seen everything from the cerebral American Splendor, to the heroic X-Men, to the heroic Goth tragedy The Crow (boy, there's a mouthful). Some have been excellent, others less so.

For my money, the ten best have been (the order is pretty much subject to change on my whim, but this is pretty much how I see it) -

1. American Splendor - How Paul Giamatti didn't get at least a best actor nomination out of this is beyond me. The movie may deal with many more serious issues than other comic book adaptations, but this little slice of Harvey Pekar's life is absolutely fascinating, in part because of how it was filmed, but in larger part because of Giamatti.

2. A History of Violence - Admittedly, I am coming from only one side of this, having never read the graphic novel, but for a movie, it was pretty damn good. Worth watching, if for no other reason than to see the performance of William Hurt.

3. The Crow - Honestly, I enjoyed Brandon Lee's swan song more than the comic book itself. Dark and moody, this is the movie that Burton's Batman should have been. Even Michael Wincott who played the villain in The Crow was a better villain than Jack Nicholson's Joker.

4. Blade - Very nice adaptation of one of Marvel's fringe characters. Good action, decent acting, and nice development of their very own mythology surrounding Vampires.

5. Batman Begins - Finally, a Batman movie that was shot right, cast right (Katie Holmes notwithstanding), and scripted right. Ironic though that it took pretty much a British cast to get the American super hero right.

6. Spider-man - Outside of making the Green Goblin look like some sort of nouveau sports mascot, I was impressed with the adaptation's faithfulness (in spite of certain liberties, such as the biological webbing) to the comic book, and personally had no issue with Kirsten Dunst as Mary Jane as many fans do. The character itself is kind of innocuous, so why would I be bothered by any vaguely competent actor in the roll?

7. X-Men - An entertaining action film well done from beginning to end.

8. Heavy Metal - This animated piece, dated by today's standards, is a personal favorite, and I know, not to everyone's taste. I never understood the need to string the vignettes together, as most of the stories probably would have stood on their own. Like the magazine, the stories varied from the comic, to the tragic, to the melodramatic...and it always reminds me of college, but that's a different story.

9. Sin City - Frank Miller's homage to the noir detective stories of the 1940's. If you go into it expecting a deep and meaningful film, be prepared to be disappointed.

10. The Rocketeer - Reminiscent of the 1940's serials, upon which the comic book was based, this was just fun. Pay particular attention to Timothy Dalton and Alan Arkin who appear to be enjoying their parts more than anyone else in the picture.

There are plenty of others that I would consider - Akira, Men in Black, The Mask are all worthy, and on another day, one of them might bump one of the above. For today, though, that's my list.

I would love to hear what others have to say about their favorites, or what you might disagree with that made my list.

Movie Review: The Fountain

2007-06-17T08:10:00.000-07:00

Okay, here I am chiming in with a movie review.

As the mom of a two year old with a simmering distain for rude movie-goers, I have gotten into the habit of waiting until things come out on DVD to watch them. This is remarkable, given a five year period when I saw virtually everything in the theater (I worked at a movie theater and saw things for free-those were the days).

So The Fountain. Have you ever had that feeling where you are feeling suicidal, but need that extra push to get you to actually "go through with it"? Then The Fountain is the movie for you! Let me tell you, it has the one thing you need-90 minutes of meditation on the inevitability of death.

I haven't even quite decided if I know what was going on in the film, let alone if I liked it. I can say that I am not sure if it works. Apparently I am not the only one. Scouring the Internet for other conversations on what exactly this film might be about, I could not find a consensus. And whether one loves it or hates it seems to be the main talking point-there is no middle ground.

It is definitely the type of film that could be dissected in a film class, but does not make for an enjoyable Saturday night flick. But if you are feeling particulary pensive and desire to drown in your sorrows or want to join in the discussion about this very strange film, Netflix it and brew yourself up a nice cup of tea, 'cause it'll be a long night.

Super Teams, the new frontier for Hollywood...

2007-06-14T09:21:00.000-07:00

The dominoes appear to be falling.

With the The Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer about to be released, rumors that the Watchmen is floating into the casting stages, additional rumors about an Avengers movie, a script in the can for the Justice League, and three X-Men movies, and The Fantastic Four, not to mention The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen under the belts of Hollywood studios in recent years, it looks like the movie mill is really just now ramping up its foray into the world of super teams. But how many could they do, and how successful will they really be?

Hollywood is two for five in quality entertainment with the super groups, producing decent films in only the first two X-Men films.

We have yet to see Hollywood produce a decent product from an Alan Moore work, so I have relatively low expectations on the long-rumored Watchmen movie, particularly considering what is leaking about casting choices which include Keanu Reeves as the favored actor to play Dr. Manhattan.

As for the Avengers, there is no script yet, although there is a writer who has discussed working on an Avengers movie.

The Justice League is another matter.

Even though, according to reports, a script has been turned in, with DC tied up in Superman and Batman projects, this could either be a long wait before we see anything made, or it could be that there will be several re-writes of the script which is said to include both of DC's heavy hitters.

This is one of those projects that I would love to see made, but doubt it would be done right (anyone who has seen clips of the ill-fated and never aired pilot of the Justice League television show shot in the late 90's on youtube knows of which I speak). I first really got into the JL while reading Batman in the mid-1980's. I thought highly of Keith Geffen's writing and enjoyed many of the satellite characters like Blue Beetle, Guy Gardner, and of course J'onn J'onz.

The title itself was not terribly popular, getting canceled after a 10-year run (although not terribly unpopular, either), but, as always, was reincarnated as the Justice League of America. The JLofA was more serious, leaving behind some of the humor that laced the pages of its 1980's counterpart. One of the questions becomes, what incarnation of the league will the movie tackle?

Without Batman or Superman, the major characters, probably in order of recognition for the non-comic book fan become Wonder Woman, The Flash, and Green Lantern. That begs the question of marketability with the general public in the eyes of the producers.

I leave you with this question - can a Justice League film without Superman or Batman be worth the investment of cash into big name actors if the Superman and Batman are written out of the script?

Stan Lee and Disney together again for the first time

2007-06-07T09:55:00.000-07:00

According to a report at the Cinematical Blog, Stan Lee has just inked a deal with Disney to...essentially produce new ideas for movies, television, and DVD's. Lee and his POW! Entertainment is expected to be a creative force giving Disney any number of original characters.

The two biggest things I can think of off the top of my head that Lee has given us in recent years have been the short lived Stripperella and the reality show Who Wants to be a Superhero. Given his recent track record, I would call this a win for Lee and a loss for Disney.

Let's face it, Lee, while still a name, just isn't the creative force he once was.

Much like his former partner in comics, Jack Kirby, Lee's work has declined with age. Sure, late in the game Kirby had come up with DC characters The New Gods, Darkseid, and the One Man Army Corps (OMAC), but he also did Kamandi: Last Boy on Earth.

Here's hoping Lee can show some of the old magic that he had when partnered with Kirby and the two came up with the Silver Surfer, the Incredible Hulk, and Fantastic Four.

Since I've been talking about zombies, how about horror comics...

2007-06-07T06:08:00.000-07:00

Horror comics are an interesting thing. Vastly popular when the medium was first coming into its own, EC Comics was at the forefront publishing horror, crime, and science fiction titles. Better known as the publisher of Mad Magazine at this point, EC's horror line all but vanished by 1955, shortly after the Comics Code Authority came into being.

The impetus of the CCA was Dr. Fred Wertham and his book, Seduction of the Innocence. Wertham, a psychiatrist, linked juvenile delinquency to comic books based on flimsy evidence and sloppy processes. In spite of that, his book was well received and sparked a major censorship movement with parents and government.

In a move to avoid major governmental interference, as the senate launched an inquiry into the industry, the industry itself launched the CCA and imposed their own limits. EC's horror and crime lines, typically considered more adult fare, had difficulty passing the industry's strict guidelines - those guidelines are where much of the superhero moral code was born that permeated DC throughout the late 1950's until the 1980's.

EC's horror comics, often hailed by industry historians as ahead of their time, went away. In it's place, comics like the watered down 1960's entry from DC; Strange Adventures.

But a new player hopped on the boat in the mid 1960's - Warren. Warren skirted the issue by publishing their comics as magazines, rather than comic books, thus avoiding the need to pass their work through the Comics Code Authority. The big three that came out of Warren (at least that I enjoyed), were Creepy, Eerie, and Vampirella. Often done in anthology format, these magazines would have several short horror pieces. In the cases of Eerie and Creepy, they were strung together by a Tales from the Crypt Crypt Keeper sort of character - Uncle Creepy and Cousin Eerie.

Unfettered by the limitations of the CCA, artists like Neal Adams, Frank Frazzetta, and Gene Colan stretched the limits of comic art at the time, exploring places that hadn't been seen in the medium in a decade.

Why? Because these were the teenagers ten years earlier that saw the EC horror comics, and as adults in the 1960's were demonstrating their artistic influences.

Personally, I have always had a soft spot for these magazines. They are the bridge between EC in the 1950's to Heavy Metal in the 70's and 80's and the Silver Age grandparents to DC's Vertigo horror comics like Hellblazer, and more recently, Marvel's Legion of Monsters line, which is even reminiscent of those anthology magazines, running at least two stories with wildly divergent artwork.

For those who haven't caught the Legion of Monsters, I would recommend the titles that I have seen, with the caveat - be prepared to expect at some point during the run some weak tales. It is just the nature of the anthology style beast.

Braaaaiiiinnnss

2007-06-06T09:17:00.000-07:00

A quick revisiting of current poll standings in regards to Zombie films - I have had additional sentiments expressed to me or outright voted at the WiredFrederick site. The current standings are as follows -

1. Night of the Living Dead (19 points)

2. Tie
Dawn of the Dead (2004 - 15 points)
Dawn of the Dead (orig - 15 points)

4. Shaun of the Dead (12 points)

5. 28 Days Later (10 points)

6. Tie
Evil Dead II (5 points)
Army of Darkness (5 Points)

8. Night of the Living Dead (1990, 4 points)

9. Dead Alive (3 Points)

Also receiving votes, Ed and his Dead Mother, Zombi 2, Grindhouse: Planet Terror, Night of the Creeps and Return of the Living Dead.

What is it about these films that attract us? Or are you one of those who dislike this genre? If so, why?

So, over at Wired Frederick...

2007-06-05T08:05:00.001-07:00

I have had a poll running regarding what the best zombie movies of all time are (that would be www.wi-fred.blogspot.com). So far I only have three votes, and would like to see a few more.

As it is, weighting each place (5 points for 1st, four for second, and so on), and number of votes received acting as the tie-breaker, here are the rankings -

1. Dawn of the Dead (2004) - 10 points on 3 votes
2. 28 Days Later - 9 points on 2 votes
3. Shaun of the Dead
Evil Dead II - 5 points on 2 votes (each)
5. Night of the Living Dead (original) - 5 points on 1 vote
6. Dawn of the Dead (original) - 4 points on 1 vote
7. Army of Darkness - 3 points on 1 vote
8. Dead Alive - 2 points on 1 vote
9. Ed and his Dead Mother
Night of the Creeps - 1 point on 1 vote (each)

C'mon people, I know there are other zombie fans out there. I want to hear from you - your top 5 zombie films in order, best to worst.

Battlestar Galactica going into its final season

2007-06-04T07:59:00.000-07:00

Check out this report from The Hollywood Reporter. I guess that means that by the end of 2008, anyone who wants a Galactica fix will either have to watch in reruns, get the DVD's, or for new story lines, pick up the comic book unless the Caprica spin-off actually moves forward.

For my money, this has been the best show on television since it first aired as a mini-series. Even the weak episodes have been pretty good.

As for resorting to the comic book for new story lines, personally, I've never been fond of comic book adaptations. For the most part I have found that the writing never lives up to the original source material (and sometimes it works the other way...League of Extraordinary Gentlemen and Constantine, I'm looking at you).

I don't know if it's just that the writers don't have all the nuances down, or if it's something else, but the adaptations just never seem to work.

As for the four years of Galactica? I would like to express my gratitude to the producers, directors, writers, and actors who have given life to what was a cheesy sci-fi show from my youth. I still can't believe that the one begot the other, but thanks all, it's been one hell of a ride and I'm looking forward to the final season. Just please, please find a way to make that season three ending work without it coming off as ridiculous (I know that each of the characters were having trouble sleeping, but none of them seemed so far gone that they should have been channeling Bob Dylan).

Summer of the Sequel

2007-05-29T11:45:00.000-07:00

More often than not, I am going to remain faithful to the idea of writing about comic books, the hobby of collecting, etc. Every now and then, however, I'm going to pop out on a little side trip to movie land...there's enough related between the genres (especially with the number of adaptations that have been spit out by Hollywood recently).

I did some research recently, and it appears that the movie mill is scheduled to spit out 42 sequels this year. Some will go direct to video (as I suspect Goonies 2 and an Arnold-less True Lies 2 are slated for that fate), others will hit the cinema, as some already have to great expectation and fanfare. There is a certain fan annoyance factor that comes with this sort of thing (the old question of "can Hollywood do anything original?"), but I have to admit that it's smart marketing on the part of the producers. By going sequel, you know there's a built in audience waiting to create an emotional connection with characters they connected with in the first film (28 Weeks Later notwithstanding).

In an effort to feed our unending appetites that demand more, bigger, louder, Hollywood and points abroad have given the fanboy in all of us the following seventeen films that the comic-book/fantasy/horror/sci-fi crowd is likely to take a gander at, some of which even have comic book or video game ties...

28 Weeks Later, the follow up to 28 Days Later
AVP 2, sequel to Aliens v. Predator, originally explored in Dark Horse comics
The Bourne Ultimatum, the third adaptation of the Robert Ludlum trilogy
Day Watch, the sequel to the Russian vampire film Night Watch
Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer, from the trailers, appears to be an adaptation of the Galactus story from the 1960's that first introduces the Surfer (however, there is no mention of Galactus on IMDB...so, who knows?)
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
Hostel: Part 2
Jeepers Creepers 3 (I'm guessing this one is going straight to video)
Live Free or Die Hard
National Treasure 2: Book of Secrets
Oceans 13, kind of impressive - two sequels out of a remake of a Sinatra film
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
Resident Evil: Extinction
Saw IV
Shreck the Third
Spiderman 3
Wolverine (a prequel featuring the X-Men fav, true believers...sorry, had to get my Stan Lee reference in, also likely to spill into next year rather than this one).

This doesn't take into account other sequels slated to go into production, such as the next Harry Potter, the next Sin City, and even the Batman sequel that's currently being shot. For those of you looking for something original...don't look to Hollywood. Hell, even most of the comic books out there are derivative...and I still enjoy 'em.

Enjoy the cinema ladies and gents, looks like this summer it's gonna be a familiar place to be.

A quick note on FF: Rise of the Silver Surfer

2007-05-23T06:59:00.000-07:00

I don't know yet whether or not I will go to see this film. I have only seen parts of the first Fantastic Four film and didn't think a whole lot of what I saw. I am, however a Silver Surfer geek. I have several issues of of the original series published in the 1960's as well as a number of the one-shot specials, etc. (although the series that was published during the 1990's wasn't nearly as well done as the original, so I have only a limited number of those issues).

All that aside, I wanted to mention that I feel that the Surfer looks good in the previews (I'm not saying anything about the movie, just the Surfer's appearance), and it's interesting to note that Doug Jones is playing the Marvel standby.

For those of you comic geeks who are unfamiliar with Jones, trust me, you have seen him before. Jones is a veteran of the comic book film adaptation game having appeared in Batman Returns (1992), Tank Girl (1995), Mystery Men (1999), The Adventures of Rocky & Bullwinkle (2000), Men In Black II (2002), Hellboy (2004), and the upcoming Hellboy II (2008), not to mention other fantasy favorites such as the Hush episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer as one of the Gentlemen, and as both Pan and the Pale Man in Pan's Labyrinth.

You may not recognize Jones as he is often in monster make-up (in Hellboy he played Abe Sapien).

Musing on why Sean Connery is an idiot...

2007-05-22T04:16:00.000-07:00

Don't get me wrong...I have enjoyed many a Sean Connery film, but the man is indeed an idiot.

Connery was Peter Jackson's first choice to play Gandalf in The Lord of the Rings. Connery turned down the role, in spite of a very sweet deal that included a percentage of the movie's profits because he, and I am paraphrasing, just didn't get it. He has reiterated that position after seeing the movie.

So...to put it in perspective, Sean "Zardoz" Connery turned down LOTR and instead did The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.

Idiot.

That link to the right...

2007-05-20T13:21:00.000-07:00

For Comic Collector Live takes you to free software with which to catalog your collection. Currently the free version that is available is a beta testing version and it's not bad. It needs work, but not bad. As far as free software goes, I would recommend it. For the most part it is easy to use and it allows me to track my purchases.

I have cataloged somewhere between a quarter and a third of my entire collection (I'm guessing), which currently has me at just under 800 books, and here are the issues I have come across -

What's in the database -

Occassional missing titles (rare).
Some titles not completely updates (rare).
Occassional variation in the cover title v. the database title (rare).

How the database works -

You can only sort on issue number within the data entry interface.
It does not link to a price-guide, so it is up to the owner to update collector worth - not a bad thing, as it also forces the owner to grade the comic book. Still, I can't deny that it would be nice to have the automatic update.
There are currently only two reports that coalate any sort of data from the database - a summary that outlines cover value, price paid, and resale value (if you grade and update the comics in your database), and an overall report that provides title, price paid, grade, etc.
Unfortunately, you cannot currently sort by grade or price. Hopefully that will be dealt with in the next version.
Based on some studies of CGC rated comics I have come across, the rating software, which asks 12 questions, is a tougher grader than the guys at CGC - nothing wrong with that either as it is better to err on the side of caution when grading, than to overestimate a book's worth.

In spite of many of the issues, it has been nice to be able to catalog my books. I recently finished grading most of my Silver Age and early Bronze Age comics (I still have to catalog my Vampirella's) and it was very illuminating (especially since I look for the cheapies, and some of the books I paid $2.00 for could be worth $50.00 or $60.00).

Like I said, the database software is not without problems, but I have found it to be useful and I do recommend the program for anyone who doesn't want to spend gobs of money on some of the other software out there. Also, looking for an online price guide? I have a link to the right.

Vilkommen, Bienvenue, Welcome

2007-05-18T07:48:00.000-07:00

As the writer who brought you sports rants in www.theangryfan.blogspot.com and Western Maryland arts and entertainment in www.wi-fred.blogspot.com, I have decided that it's time to add another writing venture to my little part of the blogosphere - so I present to you the Gibbering Idiot Press. Here I will be writing about comic books and all things related to that old pulp genre.

Sometimes there will be rants about histories, characters, movie adaptations, etc. From time to time I hope to have guest writers provide their views.

As for me, a little background -
I have been collecting for over 20 years.
I briefly worked for a comic book shop in Hampton, VA in 1993, mostly handling the convention circuit for the owner.
I have a thing for Silver Age/early Bronze Age comics.
I have a thing for movies adapted from comics...although I wish more of them were done better.